Saturday, December 30, 2006
Sunday, December 24, 2006
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
I thought I may be able to post some entries from work during my lunch hour, but that is not possible. We are allowed on the Internet during our lunch hour, but many sites (including blogger) are blocked. So forget keeping you informed from my office. Yes, you heard me right my office. Not that I am in it yet, but I will be sharing an office with another paralegal in a few weeks. That will be nice. I can concentrate on my work in an office much better than out on the floor where there are a plethora of conversations hoovering around my cubicle.
So as I can, I will continue to post and fill you in on all the happenings here in my world. Just let me get into a routine and let the "newness" of my new found employment status wear off.
Saturday, December 09, 2006
1. We are NOT moving back to the downtown area. Been there done that, not wanting to do it again.
2. They apartment or townhouse MUST have a washer and dryer hook-up in the unit. This is a must. I just can not stomach those apartment laundries and don't even say the word laundromat!
3. It should be closer to work but not too far, as DJ works closer to this area. With the cost of gas, we have to keep this in mind.
4. Of course it goes without saying that we have to have a place that will accept our cats. Our babies would be lost without us, and we have grown so attached to them that I could not even fathom giving them up.
5. I want the ground floor. I hate stairs. I hate living between two other floors. I do not mind having people on top of us...(get your head out of the gutter) but it seems that utility bills are much lower on the bottom floors.
That's not a large list, but it's a start I am sure the closer it gets to us actually looking for a place I will have a lot more specifications. But for now it was just nice having the feeling of knowing that there is a light at the end of this tunnel (basement)
Wednesday, December 06, 2006
Friday, December 01, 2006
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
Now don't get too excited, it probably isn't as exciting for you as it was for me.
I had a call back for a second interview with a firm I am trying to get a job with. Something I have done before, and actually enjoyed it very much. I'm still waiting for them to make a decision, so I'm holding my breath. I know don't hold it too long. But that is not what I was excited about.
What excited me was a voice I heard as I walked from my car to the building for the interview.
"Michael!!!" The voice was one I knew, but not quite recognizable. As I turned around I couldn't believe my eyes!
Standing there looking sheepishly, and as excited as I was, was an old friend, room-mate/co-worker. EER had lived with DJ and I for over a year when we first got together six years ago. She became our little sister and we took her everywhere with us. At the time she was very naive and innocent. Our goal was to change that...
After we moved from the place we shared, she left Cincinnati and moved back to her hometown in New Hampshire where she underwent a gastric by-pass. DJ and I stayed downtown and then later moved out here in the sub-burbs. We saw her a few times after that, but after time we just seemed to go our separate ways. I heard that she did get pregnant a year or so ago, and lost her baby. We tried contacting her to no avail. Then yesterday out of no where, there she was.
She filled me in on her life, and that she had moved back to Cincinnati some time ago and didn't know how to get a hold of us. She also informed me that she was married in March, but is now going through a divorce. I told her we thought she just disappeared.
I'm glad she didn't. She was a breath of fresh air when she lived with us, and even though she is not as naive as she used to be she really has not changed all that much. Her smile and laughter was fully intact. Hopefully we will be working again soon!!
Monday, November 27, 2006
Sunday, November 26, 2006
Thursday, November 23, 2006
Monday, November 20, 2006
I know from prior experience that this leads to depression and just plain laziness, which now seems to have settled into my psyche. So after Thanksgiving, I am going to put a stop to this slothfulness. I have to.
I do have another interview on Wednesday. I am not going to say or write too much about it, as I do not want to jinx things, but the opportunity sounds like a good one. Hopefully I have the skills that they need and they have the money to pay me what I need.
Other than that, I've just been trying to get ready for the upcoming holidays, which seem like they have arrived earlier this year. I know that is not the case, as they are always the same time every year, but it sure seems as though they come faster and faster every year. One of the things that I am looking forward to this year is the fact that we have two new babies this year for the holidays. It's been a long time since we have had babies around during the holiday season. Isn't that what the holidays are all about? Families and kids.
So just in case I do not post before Thanksgiving, have a good one.
Monday, November 13, 2006
Friday, November 10, 2006
What I was referring to in it being a longtime coming, was the "thumpin" (George W.'s words not mine) the Republican party got this past week. Not only did the country finally change course, but my own home state of Ohio finally woke up and realized they needed a Democratic State House. Yes, I stayed up all night long watching the election results and still one hope has not manifested itself. That Jean Schmidt would be voted OUT of office. That is yet to be determined but the least would be that someone would take that damn ugly bow out of her hair!!!!
Saturday, November 04, 2006
Thursday, November 02, 2006
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
On my home front, DJ and I are settled into his mother's basement. So far it's quite comfortable and feels like home (somewhat). I also have a couple job opportunities that have become open to me. I have sent out the resumes this week and look forward to upcoming interviews. Hopefully a job will come along soon and we will once again be packing and moving back into our own place.
Sunday I was able to spend some time with my daughter and grand-daughter. They came over for a visit with "Papa". It is so hard to believe she has gotten so big already. She will be three months on the 11th but it already seems like she is always been here. She is beginning to look a little more like her mom and less like her dad. This weekend J2 will be coming to spend the weekend. It will be be interesting to see how he adjust to me living here. But overall, all is well.
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Sunday, October 29, 2006
The bill would set up rules for the military commissions that will allow the government to proceed with the prosecutions of high-level detainees .
It would make illegal several broadly defined abuses of detainees, while leaving it to the president to establish specific permissible interrogation techniques. And it would strip detainees of a habeas corpus right to challenge their detentions in court.
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - Benjamin Franklin
Just think about it...
Saturday, October 28, 2006
So far things are fine. By saying it that way makes it seem as though I'm waiting for something to happen. I'm not really, but anytime you live with someone else it's difficult. DJ's stepfather still works everyday, as does his mother. His stepfather has to be up every morning between 4:30 and 5:00. DJ got in Friday night from work at 1:00 a.m. and after coming home he wanted to go back upstairs and outside for a smoke. I am sure that his stepfather can hear the front door opening, so I declined to go for a smoke. Lord knows if I had to be up that early I wouldn't appreciate someone coming in and out my front door waking me up. DJ went. I just do not want to do anything that would make anyone upset. I mean they are gracious enough to let us live here until we get back on our feet, we shouldn't upset their lives any more than we already have. Compromise. That's a very important word in any relationship, especially one where you have intruded upon.
The employment field does not look any more promising but I am going to be going out again next week, hitting the pavement so to speak. The sooner I can find a job the sooner we can get back on our feet and into a place of our own.
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
Monday, October 23, 2006
He was one of the stars of his class at Harvard Law School, but he has also worked as a social worker and street organiser in Chicago's roughest neighbourhoods, and later practised as a civil rights lawyer.
Thursday, October 19, 2006
I have a perfectly shaped dark circle in my center line of vision. You know when a falsh from a camera goes off and for a few minutes you have this circle in your eye and your vision is just a bit blurred? Well Mine has been like that since Monday and it seems to get worse with the fact that I am sick.
DJ is wanting to get things moved into storage and I just do not have the energy. Not to mention that I'm not real keen on the idea of moving into his mother's basement, but what else are we going to do? I need to get out and start actively looking for work again, but I just don't have the energy.
I'm not sure if the weakness and the eye problem are part of MS, or due to my being so depressed. Probably a mixture of all of it thrown together. Whatever the reason I can not afford to go to the doctor to find out, which causes me that much more anguish and frustration.
Tomorrow will be better.
Monday, October 16, 2006
Friday, October 13, 2006
I hope you enjoyed my posting yesterday, my first 12 of 12 posting. I spent a long time getting it together and posting it, but guess what? I forgot to post a link over at Chad's site! All the work for nothing. Well at least you got to read it! See, I told you, I do have a boring life.
But, I actually have plans for the weekend!
Tomorrow night Kare Bear is having a get-together over at the Back Porch Saloon, she and her hubby moved to Savannah back last year and she is coming into town for the weekend and wants to see everyone. So I will be getting out of the house for a while. I think it will do me good to get out and enjoy others company instead of sitting in this half-empty apartment. Kare Bear and I worked together for about four years at the law firm I used to work at. We were let go at the same time. I haven't seen her in quite a long time so I'm looking forward to the "reunion"
Sunday DJ is off and we are going to be packing the majority of our stuff and moving it into the storage bin. All of our living room furniture, dining room suite and boxes that we have packed. That will leave our apartment pretty empty. So for the next few weeks we will be living in an empty apartment. Of course the TV, DVD player and the computer will be the last things we move. A man has to have something to do!
Thursday, October 12, 2006
12 of 12 was started by a fellow blogger, Chad Darnell and it happens of the 12th of every month. We are to take a photo, every hour for 12 hours of that day and then post those photos with a little explanation as to what we are doing...so for all of you out there that are REALLY interested in how I spend my day here you go...
3:10 p.m. and the sun has finally decided to shine a little so I go out to the patio and enjoy the sunshine.
I pop "Alexander" into the DVD and watch Colin Farrell (YUM) and soon DJ is home and it is back to bed to start it all over tomorrow!
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Thursday, October 05, 2006
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
Twenty-seven years later as I look back on those events and the many other events in my life since that time I wonder how many chances does one get in one lifetime to start over. How many times can we, or others around us change the course of ones life and give them another chance? I’ve had many.
Sometimes it is because a person comes into your life and suddenly things are different and what was important no longer seems that way. That has happened in my life as well. Each time you look at the opportunity with hope and dreams and then another event or person comes into your life and puts another perspective on who and what you are. Then more choices are demanded of you.
Or it could come one day when you are working in a dead end job, just trying to make ends meet and suddenly that job that you despised is taken from you or you walk away from it. Suddenly a job that you thought was taking you nowhere now makes you realize it was your life. Unfortunately you learnt that too late. But just in the nick of time something happens and puts you back on your path, and those lessons are soon forgotten. But then you find yourself in the same situation only under different circumstances and you once again forgot the lesson you learnt from before. The same mistakes are made and choices are placed before you and make the same ones that you made before. Over and over again the cycle continues until you finally learn from your mistake and when the opportunity arises again you make the adjustments and do not make the same choice you made before.
Twenty-seven years ago I had a choice to make and with the help of someone dear to me I was able to make a choice I was afraid to make on my own and it brought me to where I am today. And as I said before, probably saved my life. Eleven years ago, again I was at a crossroad and not willing to make a choice and someone stepped into my life and I chose a path. I chose that path then; thinking they would be there with me through it, but as I found out, that wasn’t the case. So for a few more years, do to that choice that was made, I had to learn another step into the lesson we call life.
Now again today I am living with choices that either I made or others made for me and again I am wondering if I made the right ones. I look back on those others times to see where I may have made the mistake, but honestly I didn’t see them then and now I wonder if I am still not able to distinguish which choices were right and which were wrong. Sometimes it is more difficult to see your own mistakes than those of others around you. Their mistakes are easy to spot. We can sit back and say that if we were in their position we would have done things so much differently. But would we have done anything different if in the same situation with the same choices and emotions involved in that decision? No, I venture to say probably not.
But I finally figured it out. Or in my feeble wisdom, I think I did. Others didn’t make those choices for me, regardless of how much I think they did. They may have influenced me, but ultimately I made those choices. And when I made those choices I made them for what was right for me at that given time. I thought I looked at how it was going to effect my future and my current life and I chose. Ultimately it was I that had to live with the consequences of those actions, not so much the others that were involved or were the influencing factor. But me, the one who made the choice.
We can sit back and look at our life and blame a lost job, a lost opportunity or another individual for our mistakes and even our accomplishments but that is not the case. It is us. It is our own spirit, personality, our drive or whatever we want to call it but ultimately it is ourselves.
So here I am, again at a point in my life where I am dealing with the consequences of my actions and choices, and whether they are good or bad I can only look at myself for the answers. I also can only change the situation by my own efforts. I cannot wait for a knight in shining armor to come and whisk me away, or to sit and wait for the opportunity to fall into my lap by some divine power. I have to make it happen. I have to take control. I have to look deep within myself at my past mistakes and accomplishments and find where that strength is to get me through another cross in the road.
Weighing my options has never been a strong suit for me. When I’ve made choices in my life before I take it head on, sometimes with no thought or even perception of how it is going to effect me or others around me in weeks, months, even years to come. I would say we all are guilty of that. In the heat of a moment, or in the passion of the battle we decide, not thinking about the possible outcomes.
So what were those lessons we learnt from those past choices we made; if thrown into another situation we are going to react the in the same manner because of who we are? I’m not sure, but I think those past lessons play into the scenario even without our conscience mind realizing it. It has been said for every action there is a reaction. But how do we make that reaction without…reacting?
To use the old cliché, life is too short to cry over spilt milk. So I suppose I will make the choice the same way I have before. With what I feel in my heart is right. Giving no thought of what my mind is telling me, and just hope it all works out in the end. Will I use any lessons I learnt before? You bet I will. Will I look back on the decision and say; I wish I would have done that instead? Yes, probably. But you know what? Regardless if it is the right choice, or the wrong one, only one thing is important. Am I a better person because of it? I think we all are. Just as long as we learn. It may not be something we even realized right now that we learnt, but somewhere down the road when the next opportunity arises, or it’s time for the next choice we will remember.
Over the next few weeks DJ and I will be starting over. Due to choices made we are proably going to have to leave our home and move in with his mother to get our finances back on the right track. Have I learnt lessons from this? I certainly hope so because I'm not sure I have too many "starting overs" let in me.
Saturday, September 30, 2006
Funny how some things you remember like that, but other things you totally forget. Like the name of the really cute kid on my paper route when I was 10. He was a little older than me and every Saturday when I would collect he'd be the one to pay me and with the $1.75 he always gave me a tootsie roll. I am sure his mother gave it to him to give me, but I always wished it was actually him that thought enough of me to give me candy each week. But for the life of me I can not remember his name.
The same way I forgot the name of one of the women that interviewed me on Thursday. The interview went great and at the end I wanted to impress them that I remembered their names, so I said Thank you to each of them calling them by name, except the second girl's name was Bev, not Joyce. They don't even sound alike. I hate it when my mind let's me down like that.
DJ is working from 10-1 this morning and then 5-2 tonight, so I have the Saturday night all to myself. Not that I am looking forward to that, because I'm not. I'd prefer him to be home with me while I sit on the computer...no really I am not going to complain, I am just thankful that one of us is working. So I suppose I will spend the rest of my Saturday writing.
So how many days does September have?
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
Can you tell I'm just a wee bit upset?
Well not really upset.
Just extremely frustrated.
A week ago Monday had an interview (and you know my feelings regarding those) with the local cable company for a position in their customer service department. My appointment was at 9:00 a.m., I arrived at 8:40. I waited over an hour before the interviewer arrived. She was obviously unprepared. (no pencil, not even a pad of paper). She found the writing utensils and put me in a room, which by the way looked like a storage closet with a table in it, and conducted an interview asking predetermined questions from a script she had in front of her. The complete interview lasted about 20 minutes. She explained to me that if the HR department felt they didn't need my services that I would be sent a postcard stating just that. If I did not receive that postcard I was to call her office the following Monday to follow up. I never received the postcard and now I have left four messages on this woman's answering machine and two e-mails requesting her to let me know if they would like me to come back for another interview or what. I still have not even been given the decency of a return call or e-mail. And what is so bad is that this is the second company I have interviewed for that has treated me in such a callous manner.
How totally unprofessional! Would one want to work for a company so rude and unprofessional? Well not really but I need the job. They could at least CALL ME BACK!
But all is well, as I have another interview tomorrow with a government agency. Let's see if they do any better. I doubt it as I sent my application to them over two months ago and just now received a call for an interview.
At this rate, I am bound to have a job before the year ends
Saturday, September 23, 2006
The other two blogs, A Reality Past, is a compilation of research that I have been doing since 1980. It is my genealogy. My family tree. Some of my family members have wanted me to put all the information that I have researched into book form. But I find that very tedious, so instead I have started posting family bios via blogger. That way they can get the information they want and even copy the pictures that I have found and gathered over the last 26 years.
My other obsession is movies. All kinds of movies. I love the old ones, the classics, the bad ones and current ones. So what does one do with that kind of obsession? They blog about it. That is what Cinemania! is about. So if any of those interest you feel free to check them out.
So by eliminating 4 blogs and keeping only three I think I am in the right direction in freeing all this time I have on my hands. Plus, hopefully I will find out if I get that job I interviewed for on Monday by next week so my time spent blogging will be limited after that. It's a good thing. Trust me! Also by eliminating those blogs I feel I have more time for my other obsession, writing. Who knows maybe now that I have restructured these un-important details of my life I can work on the important ones.
That's a scary thought.
Good news on the finance front. DJ got a job!! Yes, he is returning to the ever-exciting world of serving tables. He has worked in the service industry before and enjoys it. Not only that, he is GOOD at it. He has the knack, the patience and the personality it requires to be a good server. It takes a special kind of person to serve tables, and Lord knows I'm not that type of person. DJ on the other hand is a pro. Due to these skills he always made excellent tips. This news came just in time, as we received a notice today from our rental company. It's time to renew our lease. I was being a bit hesitant about that due to being unemployed, but now we can stay here!! I really do not want to move again, at least not for a while. All we need now is for that call on Monday saying that I too will join the ranks of the gainfully employed.
Thursday, September 21, 2006
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
Well I do have a routine. Every morning I get up and check my e-mail, and then I check the job postings on the three accounts I have, careerbuilder.com; monsterjobs.com and jobsonline.com and then post my resume. So I am at least doing something pertinent.
I talked to a friend tonight and found out that the relationship that they had been in for the last three years is over. They have went their separate ways and divided their things and have called it quits. Now they are starting over, again. I know how hard that is and I feel for them and hope that things will look up soon. They have told me they are ready to have some quality time with themselves and not get into another relationship right away. I hope that they do.
Speaking of time, where has September gone!? It is already the 20th of the month. I can not believe how fast it is going. It is going to be Christmas before we know it! Well I have to go, I just heard a ding on the computer and I have to check and see what e-mail account has new mail. Or maybe someone bought another one of my books on Lulu, or possibly I have another survey to take....
Sunday, September 17, 2006
Last night Silver and his son came over to join DJ and my two sons in a night of D&D. We have been playing D& D now over a year and I think I have always been the dungeon master each time we have played. Most of the dungeons I have played I have found on the Internet. A couple I have written myself. Last night we began playing the dungeon and it seemed rather familiar to me, but we continued. Finally about four hours into the game we all realized..."We've done this before!" So not to make the entire night and game a squander I mixed up what remaining time was left with two or three other dungeons and finished our game. I gave the players extra experience points due to my poor memory.
I've had three sales so far on my books at LuLu.com, so I am looking for the rest of you that I sent e-mails to purchase them fairly soon!! Honestly though I am surprised at the hits I've had already in just a few short days. I've had over 25 hits on my page at Lulu, so at least someone is looking at what I have to offer. Now if they would just buy the books.
Another weekend has come and gone, and fall is creeping in quicker than I really want it to. I love the autumn but winter is right behind it, and winter is not one of my favorite seasons. Tonight and last night it was cool enough for us to shut off our air conditioning and I am sure within a few days or weeks it will be turned off for the year. Then the heat will have to be turned on. YUCK!
We have been here over a year now. (That in itself is hard to believe.) But our electric bills have been very acceptable. Hopefully this year will be more of the same.
I used to do this quite a bit, but haven't featured a fellow blogger in a while. If you like reading blogs, check out LOVE LEMMING. I've been reading his blog for quite some time now and enjoy finding out what is going on in his life. Plus he is a SIMS2 freak like me! He has recently moved to Portland, so go see what he is blogging about!
Again, wish me luck tomorrow; I will post an update when I hear anything.
Friday, September 15, 2006
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
I published my first two books. It is not what I envisioned my books to be, but hey they are out there. Now for the small price of only $3.25 per book you can download my words onto your computer for your reading enjoyment.
I've been writing for most of my adult life and I've never actually even let anyone read what I've written, except for a couple of people. Now it's online for anyone who wants to read it. I also have several books I've started but never finished, and maybe now that I have actually put something out there I will have the drive to finish them and publish them as well.
They are e-books and you can find them here...REALITY CHECK.
Who knows, if these go over well maybe I will actually use Lulu.com to really publish them into a hardback book and send them out to bookstores. And if it goes even better maybe I can call a screenwriter and see if maybe I can make a movie based on my short stories.
Now who would I want to play me??? hmmmmm
Monday, September 11, 2006
The rest of the weekend was kind of quiet. DJ worked Saturday and then we had a nice dinner and watched TV. Sunday was more of the same, watching TV, talking to my youngest brother who turned 37 on Sunday, and having a nice quiet dinner. We played some scrabble Sunday evening (I was beat twice, but only by one point the first game) and then some "Smallville" and off to bed.
Today being 9-11, I really don't want to watch the TV, and just don't want to relive all that horror, so I suppose I will clean house and job hunt.
I remember that day very vividly. I was at work and had went into the break room for some coffee and a couple of girls were in there saying that a plane had just hit the World Trade Center. Of course we thought at first it was just an accident but then as the dram began to unfold we realized this was not an accident. Within 15 minutes the break room was at full capacity and work came to a halt throughout the office. It was just so surreal.
Isn't it amazing how our minds seem to store those kind of events in our minds with perfect clarity? I also remember the day Elvis died. I was at the Ohio State Fair for the week with the Ohio State Choir and heard it on the news. The first thing I did was call my mother. She was an avid Elvis fan. We cried together.
Or the day that Bobby Kennedy was shot? I was outside on our front porch talking with a neighbor kid and mom came out and told us to come inside. We sat in front of the TV watching the events unfold. Or the day Martin Luther King was killed? I was at school and we were sent home early. I remember teachers crying as they loaded us onto the buses. We had no idea what was happening until we got home. Of course I was really too young to understand who he was and the importance of his work, but I do remember mom saying that it would never be the same now.
Those days that mark history, mark our minds with memories of tragedy and horror. But then I think about those that were there. I was safe at work that day in September, miles away from ground zero. But those that were there that lived through it, that suffered a loss of dreams and hopes that day. There memories will be much more real than mine were that day. The effect of those days events will forever be part of their lives too, but in a much more horrific sense than I could even begin to imagine.
My first weekend with my grandson. I prefer those kind of long lasting memories in my heart and mind. But we also have to remember those events in our lives that were not so pleasant to understand what life is all about.
Our heart goes out to those that lost loved ones that day. As all our lives changed after 9-11, their lives were shattered.
Friday, September 08, 2006
Now you have to remember the last time I was with a baby for that long of a time was when my youngest AT was a baby. He is now 13. And then his mother was just a few feet away. DJ worked today so I was on my own until about 5:30. It wasn't bad. Rylan and I watched The Emperor's New Groove, Shrek and Shrek 2. He had three bottles and one "poopy" diaper. He even had a little nap. All was good.
After DJ got home we had dinner and then went to see DJ's sister play softball. Of course my grandson stole the show, and all the girls on the team had to hold him. So all was well there. One of the girls on the team even changed his diaper for me and fed him. Now I know why all these straight single guys like taking their nieces and nephews out with them. They are great girl "magnets!' Then we got back home about 9ish, and at 10:00 all hell broke loose.
Rylan began crying and screaming and nothing either DJ or I did seemed to help. Finally I took him into my arms, held him close and began rocking him, within 5 minutes he was asleep. I think someone at home has this guy spoiled! So he is fast asleep in his little vibrating baby chair, and I am sitting here on pins and needles waiting for that heart wrenching scream to start over.
Hopefully he will sleep until his next feeding which is due at midnight and then I pray he will sleep through the night. I promised to do this for them once a month so that they can have some time with just each other. But before the next visit to grandpa, I think I'm going to have a little talk with them about how they should not spoil him. Or at least give me a heads up on how he likes to go to sleep.
All in all I have enjoyed this immensely. With my own kids I was so busy working and doing all those other things when I was married I really didn't get the chance to be as much hands on as I would have liked to be. This way I can be hands on as much as I want to be and then hand them back to mommy and daddy...
Thursday, September 07, 2006
I do know that this has to end, SOON! DJ is becoming less patient with me, not that he has said anything, but after living with someone as long as we have lived together, you begin to know them.
I've thought about something the last few days. I've been thinking about my life prior to my coming out. Most of my readers know of my past and what I did for a living back then. Why couldn't I go back into the ministry? I mean I was an ordained minister, and pastored a fairly large congregation. Which I loved, by the way. I was also very blessed in my ministry. I saw the last church I was in go from about 50 active members to over 150 active members in less than two years. Plus I have several years of education under my belt, so I am qualified.
Just because I came out and chose to live my life as who I really am, why should I be denied the ability to work in the church. I know, there are not many denominations that would allow me to be a "working" minister, but why not? It was something I loved, something I was good at, and something that benefited others as well as myself. And to be honest the pay wasn't bad either. I guess in an Utopian society this may be a possibility, but in our society as it is today I guess I need to just keep plugging away at Job Builder.com and see what is a real possibility.
I know...I need to get a reality check.
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
No I am not posting a picture, there are tons of sites where you can find them. I just do not understand all the hoopla over this little girl's picture. And all the speculation if she is really Tom Cruise's baby.
Who really cares?
I posted pictures of my kids and grand kids on here for the sole purpose to share my joy with others. Not that some of my readers really care or even wanted to see them, but mainly because I am proud of my kids and grand kids. I didn't post them for people to speculate about who they are, who is really the REAL parents of them, or for others to make rude comments about them. (not that any of this has happened, I'm not Tom Cruise I guess).
I guess what I am saying is, yes we all know that Tom has pretty much turned into a nut case, and I'm not defending his actions or statements, but why take it out on this poor innocent baby? Regardless if she is or isn't Tom's biological child, she is still a child.
Let's leave the baby out of this.
Sunday, September 03, 2006
Oh, that's what I've BEEN doing for almost two months now.
Last night DJ and I decided to sit back and enjoy some TV and one another's company. At around 11:30 we decided to call it a night and go to bed. Early for me, late for him. Then it happened....
A loud beep came from somewhere. What was it? Where did it come from?
About 40 seconds later...
Oh, okay it's the smoke alarm. No problem, that is it's way of warning us it is time to change the battery.
We have no 9 volt batteries in the house???
It's 11:30 p.m. there is no where open to buy any 9 volt batteries except for the convenience store by the house where we would pay $5 for one battery.
So what did we do? No we didn't disconnect it, because if you do it sends a warning to the main office of the complex through the alarm system letting them know that we disconnected the fire alarm, which is against the law.
We just let it BEEP!
All night long.
Every 40-45 seconds.
As soon as the Dollar Store opened DJ was there getting 9 volt batteries.
Friday, September 01, 2006
But today is a new day and the beginning of a new month. Attitude is in check, mind-set is set to positive and hopefully things will change for the better. Fall is on it's way, and that is one of my favorite times of the year. I applied for several more jobs on-line and I am sure I will be getting a call in the next few days for more interviews.
So it's now September. By the way, does anyone know where the summer went?
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
I can sit back and regret my decisions that I made as a young man just out of High School or I can get off my ass and start being a little more aggressive. Plus feeling sorry for myself is really non-productive. I mean I caused this situation I am in. What sane man in his right mind would walk away from a 28k a year job with nothing to fall back on?
On another note, my grand babies are getting so big already. Justice weighs over 11 pounds and Alana is well on her way to the same. Both parents are doing well, and everyone seems happy. I should be happy for them, and I am. My youngest boys started off the new school year with a positive outlook and they both are actually looking forward to their school year. That's a first! By the way check out my Flickr page, there is a link on the left hand side of this site, just click on it and it wil take you to my photos of the grandkids.
So as I look at my situation, I should realize that I'm doing pretty good. I am blessed with four great kids, two wonderful grandchildren, a great partner that is the most patient loving man I could imagine and a handful of friends and family that are looking out for us.
Who am I to complain anyway!
Thursday, August 24, 2006
Three interviews, three rejections. I never knew trying to find employment would be so difficult. Why did I quit my job? I was being paid very well, and did very little. I know I had to deal with the bitch from hell and her psycho son everyday, but at least I had a job!
What is worse is we have received word from the Unemployment Office that DJ's unemployment will run out in two weeks. That mean no income coming into our home, at all!
At this point I don't know what we are going to do. I guess just keep looking and hoping that those rejections turn into acceptance. This is worse than it was when I was looking for a boyfriend! At least then I was able to go to the bar and order a drink to help alleviate the pain of rejection.
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
Well it's not someone with a drug problem that worries me, nor do they have a drinking problem. Hell for that matter they are healthier than I am, except for one small detail. They keep forgetting. Not just forgetting where she laid her keys or misplaced her purse, but conversations, phone calls, bill paying. My mother it seems is getting worse by the week, and she doesn't seem to think she has a problem. Her short term memory is fading quickly. Now you ask her something that happened 25, 30 or even 50 years ago and she can give you intimate details. But she can not remember a phone conversation she had five minutes ago. And her moods change drastically, in a second. Then she gets upset because of her actions.
Finally my brothers agree with what I have been saying for over a year, and now so does Dad. I am not a doctor, but I believe she has the first stages of Alzheimer's. Her mother had it, and also her great grandmother. So Dad said something to the doctor, (as they have the same family medical doctor), about how she has been and the things she has been doing. Hopefully we did something soon enough. I know that there is no cure, but medicines have improved since my grandmother was diagnosed in the late 80's.
What hurts the most is that mother doesn't understand why we are doing this. She doesn't think it is necessary. But if it isn't Alzheimer's then something is wrong and it's not just an age thing. She gets upset and almost angry if we mention it to her. I have told her several times to mention these things to the doctor and she just ignores me and blows it off. Mother is a very intelligent woman, she knows how this disease works, and therein lies the problem. She seen her mother succumb to the effects of this disease.
No it is not fair, and it is heart wrenching to even think about, but the reality of it is...It's all part of this thing we call life. The good with the bad. Mother can get mad at all of us if she wants. But intervene we did. And it is intervention, not "butting our noses" where we don't belong.
Sunday, August 20, 2006
Speaking of Vampires though, I have always been a vampire enthusiast. Not to the point where I really believe that there are real vampires out there as the fokelore states. Yes, I do believe that there are probably people out there that "think" they are vampires but not like Bela Lugosi's Count Dracula.
Think about it though, being a vampire would be, as they say, awesome. You live forever, an immortal. Yes, you have to do that by killing others and drinking their blood, but as Anne Rice's Vampires do, you could kill only the "evil doer". Live hundreds of years, never aging or becoming sick. Forever young. Well if you were lucky enough to be turned at a young age, that is. Not sure if I would want to be changed at my current age. Now maybe about 8 or 9 years ago, yeah. I was younger, less wrinkles and fat. Could you imagine it though. Living forever. But not like the vampires of old, you know the killing, murdering, blood sucking vampires we mostly think about and learnt about. I want to be the vampire with a soul, like Angel from Buffy the Vampire Slayer or Lestat, from the Anne Rice novels.
As I used to think about it, I would be lost in the magic of it, but in reality it would be horrible. Living forever that is. Everyone you know and love (your family, children, friends) would all die and you would have to watch it. Not only that but after a while when you look younger than your own grandchildren you would have to go into hiding or disappear and fake your own death. If not people would know you were an immortal. So ultimately as Anne Rice's hero, Lestat, you would be alone. Completely alone. No thanks, I couldn't bare eternity alone.
So for now I'll just read the books and play the SIMS2 and be happy with my own mortality.
By the way, you like the new look? I finally found a blog template that I really like. It's me. I've always got my head in the clouds and a cop of coffee is always close by.
Thursday, August 17, 2006
Things are going pretty slow around here, especially on the job front. I've had three interviews and had my second interview with a potential employer on Tuesday. At first I was a little intimidated with this company. It's a bank, and I have never really worked in finance, and I'm not real good with numbers. But after my second interview on Tuesday I felt much more comfortable, and I really hope they call me. It pays well and there is great potential for better opportunities. The banking world seems to be a totally different world than what I am used to, and I think I'm up for the challenge.
The ear infection continues to linger. For several nights I was unable to sleep due to the pain, but finally it seems to be subsiding and my precious sleep is not being interrupted as often. I also purchased some ear plugs, so I can also return to the pool. I just have to get the energy to do so. I'm not sure if it is a lack of energy or just a lack of wanting to do anything. I've become almost a recluse, going out only when I have to. I sit inside and read, play on the computer and look for work. My depression is getting the best of me, so I hope for a job soon. If not DC is going to be throwing me out to the wolves, as I know my moods are driving him mad.
Spent the evening with Princess tonight and my new grand-daughter. She is so precious. Her skin is flawless, so pure and almost porcelain like. And her eyes! They are just beautiful. It's hard to believe she will be a week old tomorrow.
Well that's it for now. Hopefully the call will come tomorrow about the job. Keep your fingers crossed!
Friday, August 11, 2006
They named her months ago, Alana Mae, and she was born today August 11th at 8:11 p.m. and weighed in at 6lbs. 4ozs. and was 19 inches long.
Both mommy and baby are doing great, and will be home by Sunday. She has strawberry blonde hair and blue eyes. She looks a lot like her daddy (unfortunately) but she still has a lot of her mommy's features. Like dimples and her eyes.
As you can see I'm a little excited in this picture!
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
This is also the third night in a row, I've had little or no sleep thanks to the alien that is growing in my left ear. I'm eating advil for the pain, and DJ did go and get me some drops last night. They seemed to have helped a bit, but now the entire canal is swollen, so it's hard for the drops to penetrate to the infection.
So off to the interview, I hope this guy has a loud voice, otherwise I will not be able to hear the interview questions.
Monday, August 07, 2006
Please, come again some other day!
For the last two days I have been living, no suffering immensely, with an earache. There a two types of pain that I prefer to never have. One of those is a toothache and the other is an earache. I know what has caused this pain, which has caused lack of sleep, lack of any type of comfortable position, and lack of any sex what so ever.
Swimming. Yes I went swimming three times last week and I now have swimmer's ear. I've tried everything, but no end in sight. And of course I have no $$ so I can not go to the pharmacy which is only about three blocks from house and purchase some ear drops. So it's advil and warm compresses for me until this thing empties out all the bacterial infected water I have floating in my ear.