How do you intervene into a situation when the person you are trying to help by the intervention doesn't think they have a problem? I've heard it before regarding people with addictions, that they don't realize they have a problem. I remember my own cousin telling me how he was making money by the handfuls, and felt better than he had in years, but all the while his entire body was being ravaged by the the effects of crystal meth. He died before he was 40.
Well it's not someone with a drug problem that worries me, nor do they have a drinking problem. Hell for that matter they are healthier than I am, except for one small detail. They keep forgetting. Not just forgetting where she laid her keys or misplaced her purse, but conversations, phone calls, bill paying. My mother it seems is getting worse by the week, and she doesn't seem to think she has a problem. Her short term memory is fading quickly. Now you ask her something that happened 25, 30 or even 50 years ago and she can give you intimate details. But she can not remember a phone conversation she had five minutes ago. And her moods change drastically, in a second. Then she gets upset because of her actions.
Finally my brothers agree with what I have been saying for over a year, and now so does Dad. I am not a doctor, but I believe she has the first stages of Alzheimer's. Her mother had it, and also her great grandmother. So Dad said something to the doctor, (as they have the same family medical doctor), about how she has been and the things she has been doing. Hopefully we did something soon enough. I know that there is no cure, but medicines have improved since my grandmother was diagnosed in the late 80's.
What hurts the most is that mother doesn't understand why we are doing this. She doesn't think it is necessary. But if it isn't Alzheimer's then something is wrong and it's not just an age thing. She gets upset and almost angry if we mention it to her. I have told her several times to mention these things to the doctor and she just ignores me and blows it off. Mother is a very intelligent woman, she knows how this disease works, and therein lies the problem. She seen her mother succumb to the effects of this disease.
No it is not fair, and it is heart wrenching to even think about, but the reality of it is...It's all part of this thing we call life. The good with the bad. Mother can get mad at all of us if she wants. But intervene we did. And it is intervention, not "butting our noses" where we don't belong.