A Look Back

As the year comes to a close it allows us to take a look back and see how we did and just what the year was about. As I look back on 2006 it was a year of changes for me. Major life changes. In January I found out that my son and daughter both were to become parents in 2006 and in June my grandson Rylan was born, then in August my grand-daughter Alana was born. Those two events were one of the best things in my life period, right up there with the birth of my own children, coming out and meeting DJ. What those two have brought to me, my family and to their parents is nothing short of spectacular.

In July another life altering experience which I chose myself. I walked out of the best paying job that I have ever had after two years. Yes, it was the right thing to do, but looking back I would have been more prepared. I thought I would get a job in a matter of weeks, but those weeks turned into five months of no income. We lost our apartment and are once again in debt more than we need to be. I see the light at the end of the tunnel now, but if circumstances cause that to happen again in my life, I will be more of a boy scout about it and BE PREPARED!

There were other issues I dealt with in 2006; the increasing toll MS is having on my body, and the reality of my parents getting older, the celebration of 5 years between DJ and I, a new and exciting job with great opportunities, the online publication of my book and an inner peace that I haven't felt in some time.

So overall as I look back on 2006 I would say with a rating from 1 to 10, 2006 was a 7. And for 2007? I never try to make predictions or resolutions, I just wait and see what it has to offer and face it one day at a time.

Happy New Year to all of you!

Until Next Year

See you all Next Year, have a great and safe Holiday!

It's Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas. NOT!

Yes it is only five days away, but it doesn't feel like it. Why you ask? I'll give you a few reasons...

1. I have no money: Not that Christmas is all about money and giving gifts and receiving gifts (well it has become all about that) but being unemployed for five months I have no cash to spare to buy anyone, anything. Not even my kids and grandkids. I've told them all they have to wait until Spring. Thank goodness they all understand. Even DJ and I are not buying for one another. What Christmas gifts we are giving are those that DJ has created from his own hands.

2. There is no Snow: What is Christmas without snow? Hell it hasn't even been that cold around here. The forecasters are saying it is going to be around 50 on Christmas Eve. It seems more like late March or early April around here.

3. No Christmas Cards. Well that's a lie, I have received two. One from my new employer and one from Kare Bear in Savannah. But due to our move most of my friends (the few I have) either don't send out cards or do not have my new address. For family sending out cards the only ones I get, I will receive on Christmas Eve, hand delivered.

4. Not Been Shopping: Due to the lack of money (see #1) we haven't had to shop. To be honest, this is a good one, as I hate to shop at Christmas. Nothing puts me in a worse mood than fighting crazy traffic, standing in long lines and listening to annoying Christmas songs permeating out of bad loudspeakers. I'm not a Scrooge, but online shopping is great. When you have the funds that is.

5. No Christmas Programs: I am normally invited to at least one school or church Christmas program (not that I usually go, but they could at least ask) This year nada, not one. Not even from my brother, who almost always invites me to his church's annual Christmas Cantata (what DOES that word mean anyway?)

6. No Christmas Bonus: For the past ten years I have always received a Christmas bonus, either cash or the classic holiday ham or turkey. This year due to my employment (see #1, again) I did not receive a Christmas bonus. They handed them out at work today, but being only employed with this company for a week and and half I didn't expect one. (you'd think they'd pro-rate it!)

So, Alas Christmas is upon us, but to me it seems like just any old holiday. Christmas doesn't arrive here until December 25, 2007. I have 370 days left to shop!!!!!

Frosty the Snowman Gets Whacked

This incident, which made National News on the Today Show happened just down the road from where I live... One of the assailants went to school with DJ's sister.

Ten Days Later

I know it has been ten days since my last posting, but starting a new job kind of takes getting some used to. I mean my entire schedule is thrown off. Prior to getting this fantastic new job, my days and nights were reserved for...well nothing but blogging and playing SIMS. Now my days are filled with preparing legal briefs, letters, taking phone calls, preparing more legal briefs and fillings, talking to courts, judges, attorneys and clerks. Most of my day consists of being in front of a computer screen, so when I get home I really don't feel like sitting back down in front of a computer screen.

I thought I may be able to post some entries from work during my lunch hour, but that is not possible. We are allowed on the Internet during our lunch hour, but many sites (including blogger) are blocked. So forget keeping you informed from my office. Yes, you heard me right my office. Not that I am in it yet, but I will be sharing an office with another paralegal in a few weeks. That will be nice. I can concentrate on my work in an office much better than out on the floor where there are a plethora of conversations hoovering around my cubicle.

So as I can, I will continue to post and fill you in on all the happenings here in my world. Just let me get into a routine and let the "newness" of my new found employment status wear off.

Jumping the Gun

Not that we are anywhere near ready, but I was looking at apartment ads today. It's going to be spring before we can afford to get out of here, but why wait until the last minute. So I began searching the world wide web for affordable housing. There are some requirements in our search;

1. We are NOT moving back to the downtown area. Been there done that, not wanting to do it again.
2. They apartment or townhouse MUST have a washer and dryer hook-up in the unit. This is a must. I just can not stomach those apartment laundries and don't even say the word laundromat!
3. It should be closer to work but not too far, as DJ works closer to this area. With the cost of gas, we have to keep this in mind.
4. Of course it goes without saying that we have to have a place that will accept our cats. Our babies would be lost without us, and we have grown so attached to them that I could not even fathom giving them up.
5. I want the ground floor. I hate stairs. I hate living between two other floors. I do not mind having people on top of us...(get your head out of the gutter) but it seems that utility bills are much lower on the bottom floors.

That's not a large list, but it's a start I am sure the closer it gets to us actually looking for a place I will have a lot more specifications. But for now it was just nice having the feeling of knowing that there is a light at the end of this tunnel (basement)

Running on Empty

For the past few nights I've had a really hard time trying to sleep. With everything going on, and job interviews and waiting for some word it has had me pretty stressed. Last night I wasn't able to sleep at all, so I am running on empty tonight.

But all the worry and stress was not necessary as I received word tonight that I start at my new job Monday morning!!

After 5 months of being unemployed and going to interview after interview it has finally paid off. I will be working for a small law firm downtown as an administrative/attorney assistant and will possibly head up their assistant program if they see the need for more assistants.

This is what I did back about 3 years ago with a much larger firm until they did cut backs and cut me out. I loved it then, and with a smaller firm I am sure it will not be as stressful and mind boggling. Needless to say I am excited and ready to get back into the 9 to 5 and a real job, as the last job I had you really couldn't call a job.

So I am sure my postings will be a little more upbeat in the future, but of course I will not be able to discuss my work, but I can give you general updates on how it's going.

For now I just need to go to bed, get a good nights rest and refuel my tank!

Blowing in the Wind

Well December is here. It came in with a bang too. We had temps this past week in the 60's and last night our temp dropped and then the winds blew in winter. Today it's only about 30 degrees and the winds were so high overnight and this morning that Christmas decorations were blown all over the neighborhood. DJ awoke this morning and had to go hunting for the garbage can, which had blown a block away.

Today was also the day I had hoped to hear from my most recent job interview. So far I've heard nothing. I thought it was pretty promising as I knew several employees there and had hoped this would be a benefit. The interviews (2 of them) went quite well and I thought for sure I would have heard something by now. I just keep my fingers crossed and continue hoping.

It has been five months now that I have been unemployed and I've had ten interviews with even more applications that were submitted to several employers. Still nothing. It would be nice going into the holiday season knowing I have a job, but I suppose we will just have to wait and see. Sooner or later the winds should blow in my direction.

Back From Oblivion

I had a somewhat interesting day yesterday.

Now don't get too excited, it probably isn't as exciting for you as it was for me.

I had a call back for a second interview with a firm I am trying to get a job with. Something I have done before, and actually enjoyed it very much. I'm still waiting for them to make a decision, so I'm holding my breath. I know don't hold it too long. But that is not what I was excited about.

What excited me was a voice I heard as I walked from my car to the building for the interview.

"Michael!!!" The voice was one I knew, but not quite recognizable. As I turned around I couldn't believe my eyes!

Standing there looking sheepishly, and as excited as I was, was an old friend, room-mate/co-worker. EER had lived with DJ and I for over a year when we first got together six years ago. She became our little sister and we took her everywhere with us. At the time she was very naive and innocent. Our goal was to change that...

After we moved from the place we shared, she left Cincinnati and moved back to her hometown in New Hampshire where she underwent a gastric by-pass. DJ and I stayed downtown and then later moved out here in the sub-burbs. We saw her a few times after that, but after time we just seemed to go our separate ways. I heard that she did get pregnant a year or so ago, and lost her baby. We tried contacting her to no avail. Then yesterday out of no where, there she was.

She filled me in on her life, and that she had moved back to Cincinnati some time ago and didn't know how to get a hold of us. She also informed me that she was married in March, but is now going through a divorce. I told her we thought she just disappeared.

I'm glad she didn't. She was a breath of fresh air when she lived with us, and even though she is not as naive as she used to be she really has not changed all that much. Her smile and laughter was fully intact. Hopefully we will be working again soon!!

Happy, Merry Whatever!

Well it seems as though the Christmas shopping season is in full blown mode. According to the numbers, Black Friday was a great financial success. All those 5:00 a.m. shoppers must have done some heavy duty plastic swiping. Personally getting up before the crack of dawn to go to a mall or retail store filled with thousands of hormonal women (and men) to fight for "tickle me Elmo" or whatever it is that they are fighting for this year, seems a bit neanderthal to me. It's like you have to be the first caveman out in the field to get the last or best bison.

DJ's sister did though. She lives directly across the street from a Meijer. I mean it is literally across the street from her condo. She can be there in 10 minuted by walking, 3 by car. She had her heart set on getting a 27' flat screen TV for the sale price of $59.99 (after a $40.00 mail-in-rebate) for her living room. She awoke at 4:00 a.m. after spending the biggest bar night of the year out consuming mass quantities of alcohol. Who knows, she probably never even went to bed. She arrived in the parking lot at 4:45 a.m. with about 250 other cars in the lot. At 5:00 a.m. she was going through the doors and began heading straight to the electronics department. As she passed by other early bird shoppers she noticed that many of them had their carts already filled with the very same TV she was going to purchase. Some even had two of them in their carts. You guessed it. By the time she made her way to the special priced TV banner, there were none left. This was at 5:10 a.m.

What does this tell me? That the employees had already ravaged this display the night before and left about 8 TVs for public consumption. Or that they only had five in stock and she saw those in carts as she made her way to pick up hers.

Then of course there is this whole PlayStation 3 fiasco. Why didn't Sony prepare for this onslaught of consumers and make enough of these to go around? Why? Because then they would have had to lower the price of them. People sat out in front of the local Best Buy for three days waiting to get these things. Hell, at one store a guy was shot, and at another store there was a stampede and the police had to intervene! CRAZY! Back when I was growing up, my mother would have never waited in line to get a gift for me or anyone else not to mention paying that much for a game. And if they had, that would be the only thing I got the entire next two YEARS! I remember being excited one year at Christmas because I got new underwear!

Today I heard on the news that Wal-Mart, trying to make everyone happy and to not offend, has decided to return to the "Merry Christmas" greeting instead of last year's "Happy Holidays". They are allowing the cashiers and their floor staff to "size up" each customer and then determine what greeting to use, whether it be Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, or Happy Holidays. Please let's not offend anyone... so to all of you out there, my wish for you is to be happy and be safe...

and,

Merry Whatever!!

Another Thanksgiving

I hope everyone's Thanksgiving was as good as mine. We had a beautiful day, and everyone was there and healthy. It was even more special as this was the first Thanksgiving for my two new grandbabies, Rylan and Alana. Holidays just seem more like holidays when there are babies around. We all ate too much and then passed out afterwards.

I also was upbeat as I had a very good interview on Wednesday. Hopefully I will hear something this next week. I am so looking forward to going back to work, but I do not want to get my hopes up too much as I have before and just been disappointed. So I'm just keeoing my fingers crossed and hope for the best.

So much has changed since this time last year. DJ and I were both working this time last year and in our own place. My son had just gotten married and told us that they were having a baby. Now not only did my son have a son, but my daughter had a baby, DJ and I both had a change in employment and now living with his mother. I could dwell on the negatives, but I am just thankful that I have all that I do, and that another Thanksgiving has come and gone and we were all able to be there and that we all are healthy and happy.

I added some new pictures over at flickr, so check them out. The link is over on the right. This was taken Thanksgiving, a 4 generation picture with my mom, Sarah, Alana and myself.

Happy Turkey Day!

Happy Turkey Day!!

Sloths & Turkeys

Everything is running the same course here as it has for the past five weeks or so. Maybe even longer than that. One thing that has changed is now that DJ is working mostly night-shift, our sleeping habits have changed drastically. He normally gets home anywhere from 11 PM to 2 AM and I wait up for him. So that means my ass stays in bed WAY TOO LONG every morning/afternoon. This is not a good habit. I know this and I still lie there in bed until I absolutely HAVE to get up.



I know from prior experience that this leads to depression and just plain laziness, which now seems to have settled into my psyche. So after Thanksgiving, I am going to put a stop to this slothfulness. I have to.



I do have another interview on Wednesday. I am not going to say or write too much about it, as I do not want to jinx things, but the opportunity sounds like a good one. Hopefully I have the skills that they need and they have the money to pay me what I need.



Other than that, I've just been trying to get ready for the upcoming holidays, which seem like they have arrived earlier this year. I know that is not the case, as they are always the same time every year, but it sure seems as though they come faster and faster every year. One of the things that I am looking forward to this year is the fact that we have two new babies this year for the holidays. It's been a long time since we have had babies around during the holiday season. Isn't that what the holidays are all about? Families and kids.



So just in case I do not post before Thanksgiving, have a good one.

Adapting

Since moving in with DJ's parents we have had to share the internet service. Which is problematic, so we decided to purchase the wireless internet service that their internet provider was offering. After four hours of dealing with my internet provider, I finally reconnected to the the internet via wireless...

We had to purchase a new wireless modem from the provider, which we were charged $42.00 (for the service so they said, not the equipment). We asked them point blank..."now is this ALL we need to be able to set up multiple computers via this wireless modem?"

Their reply was..."Yep, you don't need anything else."

So we popped home and set up everything. But there was nothing in their $42.00 bundle that we had to hook up to the second computer. How do we connect to the internet on the second computer without any adpaters or plugs or cords? I mean I am pretty up on current technology and I know we would have to do something to the second computer to allow it to pick up the feed. So we called tech support.

According to tech support we also had to purchase a wireless USB adapter for the second computer as my computer did not have a wireless card. So we called our internet provider back and complained that we did NOT have all the tools to be able to connect to the service that we had just paid $42.00 for. Their response was..."Oh well, you will have to have an adapter to connect to the service, we are sorry that was not explained to you."

So off to Best Buy and another $69.00 for a wireless adapter.

But now all is well and DJ's sister can be on the internet the same time that I am and on her wireless cell phone as well. All is good.

Isn't technology great?

As long as you have the money it is.

Long Time Coming

It has been a long time coming, and I'm not talking about my blog postings. I know it has been almost a week, but I have been busy working on some of my other blogs...go ahead take a look, they are all over there on my blog lists. See I have been busy. A gentleman posted a comment the other day on my blog Glance Back, about how neat it would be if I focused just on Presidential History, so a new blog was created this week, PresiTrivial. Go check it out, well not unless Presidential trivia would really excite you.

What I was referring to in it being a longtime coming, was the "thumpin" (George W.'s words not mine) the Republican party got this past week. Not only did the country finally change course, but my own home state of Ohio finally woke up and realized they needed a Democratic State House. Yes, I stayed up all night long watching the election results and still one hope has not manifested itself. That Jean Schmidt would be voted OUT of office. That is yet to be determined but the least would be that someone would take that damn ugly bow out of her hair!!!!

Doogie is GAY!

I'm not really sure about Doogie, but Neil Patrick Harris, the actor who currently is seen weekly on the CBS comedy, "How I Met Your Mother" and from Doogie Howser, M.D. fame, has announced to People magazine that...

"I am quite proud to say that I am a very content gay man living my life to the fullest and feel most fortunate to be working with wonderful people in the business I love."

Speculation has been running rampant for sometime about Harris sexual orientation, and he states that he has never denied it, but had never had the need to discuss or verify it until recently.

So another entertainer comes out of the closet.

My question is, why do we make it such a big deal? We don't have websites devoted to outing heterosexuals, or having lists of all the actors and actresses that are hetero. What should it matter whom we have sex with? Then again here I am making a big deal about it by posting it on my blog with all the other thousands of bloggers, so who am I to question our motives? I know I am being naive, but someday...someday soon I hope, it will not matter.

But regardless, way to go Doogie!

Gotta Love It!

This will brighten your day!

All is Well

If you read my blog regularly you know for some time I have been concerned about my mother. She seems to forget things, not just forget things but forget conversations that she has just had. Finally after months of prodding and begging she went to the doctor and had a check up and had some tests run. Luckily everything came back normal. There was no indication that she is suffering from Alzheimer's. The doctor stated that she is just having normal "old age" forgetfulness. Personally I think her doctor is a quack, but tests don't lie. So for now my concerns were unwarranted.

On my home front, DJ and I are settled into his mother's basement. So far it's quite comfortable and feels like home (somewhat). I also have a couple job opportunities that have become open to me. I have sent out the resumes this week and look forward to upcoming interviews. Hopefully a job will come along soon and we will once again be packing and moving back into our own place.

Sunday I was able to spend some time with my daughter and grand-daughter. They came over for a visit with "Papa". It is so hard to believe she has gotten so big already. She will be three months on the 11th but it already seems like she is always been here. She is beginning to look a little more like her mom and less like her dad. This weekend J2 will be coming to spend the weekend. It will be be interesting to see how he adjust to me living here. But overall, all is well.

Happy Halloween

Think About It

As most of us know by now a bill was passed on September 29...

The bill would set up rules for the military commissions that will allow the government to proceed with the prosecutions of high-level detainees .

It would make illegal several broadly defined abuses of detainees, while leaving it to the president to establish specific permissible interrogation techniques. And it would strip detainees of a habeas corpus right to challenge their detentions in court.


"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - Benjamin Franklin

Just think about it...

Settled

Well we are all settled in. Most everything is moved, we still have just a few items we need to put into storage, but for all intents and purposes we are moved in.

So far things are fine. By saying it that way makes it seem as though I'm waiting for something to happen. I'm not really, but anytime you live with someone else it's difficult. DJ's stepfather still works everyday, as does his mother. His stepfather has to be up every morning between 4:30 and 5:00. DJ got in Friday night from work at 1:00 a.m. and after coming home he wanted to go back upstairs and outside for a smoke. I am sure that his stepfather can hear the front door opening, so I declined to go for a smoke. Lord knows if I had to be up that early I wouldn't appreciate someone coming in and out my front door waking me up. DJ went. I just do not want to do anything that would make anyone upset. I mean they are gracious enough to let us live here until we get back on our feet, we shouldn't upset their lives any more than we already have. Compromise. That's a very important word in any relationship, especially one where you have intruded upon.

The employment field does not look any more promising but I am going to be going out again next week, hitting the pavement so to speak. The sooner I can find a job the sooner we can get back on our feet and into a place of our own.

Into the Basement

Well tomorrow is the day. DJ and I will start moving our final belongings into our storage facility and be moving into his mother's basement. (Picture is not the actual basement)

Now before you get all worried, it's not as bad as it sounds. The basement is completely renovated and has carpeting, paneling and walls. It is also a shrine to Dale Earnhardt. Which if you are a Nascar fan you'd want to live there too. I like Nascar, but to say that I was a fan would be...well just a lie. However over the next few months, I will literally be living in Dale Earnhardt Shrine. I am sure that after I move out red and black will NOT be colors I will use in any decorating for quite some time.

Hopefully I will find employment soon and we can get our finances in order and get back into a place of our own. At least we will have cable while we are there!!

2008 Is Right Around the Corner

As most of you know, I try to limit my political views on my blog, posting as little as possible regarding that issue, but...

Over the last few days I've been hearing and seeing a lot of Barack Obama. If you have not heard of him, he is a first term Democratic Senator from Illinois. Before 2004 no one had ever heard of this passionate politician. His political promise has been evident since the moment he stunned the 2004 Democratic National Convention with a keynote speech emphasising all the things that bind, rather than divide, Americans.

Now he has stated that he may very well run for President... "Given the response I've been getting the past several months, I have thought about the possibility," Mr Obama told NBC's Meet The Press. After next month's mid-term elections, he continued, he would "sit down and consider it".

I have been following him for sometime and listened to him in speeches and most recently on Oprah, and he sounds and looks like someone I would support. Then this morning I read an article while surfing the "net" and was appalled at what I read. The person (and I use that term loosely) started his rant with..."Obama is Black"

That was just the beginning of what I would describe as one of the most racist articles I have read in quite sometime and I became enraged. To think that we still live in a country where we base someone's abilities on their race made me sick to my stomach. If he does decide to run, I pray this does not become a campaign issue. Personally I never even thought about him being black when I first heard him give the keynote speech in 2004, I was more amazed at his passion, intelligence and charisma.

Senator Obama carries some of the same sort of charisma that propelled John Kennedy into the Presidency in 1960. He has a natural appeal that is multicultural. He is the son of a Kenyan father and a Kansas mother, he has known both poverty and privilege.
He was one of the stars of his class at Harvard Law School, but he has also worked as a social worker and street organiser in Chicago's roughest neighbourhoods, and later practised as a civil rights lawyer.

It is way too early for me to make any decision on my presidential vote for 2008 ( as we really have no idea who is really going to run) but some things are certain, it is NOT going to be based on their gender or the color of his/her skin.

Could this be the beginning of an Obama/Clinton Democratic ticket? If so just remember you heard it hear first...(probably not the first, but one of the first.)

Tomorrow Will Be Better

Things have got to start happening soon! I'm loosing it. I've been sick again, since Monday. For three days now all I can do is lay in bed on on the couch. My entire body feels like it weighs twice it's weight and my head is just swimming. Not to mention I woke up Monday with a strange problem in my left eye.

I have a perfectly shaped dark circle in my center line of vision. You know when a falsh from a camera goes off and for a few minutes you have this circle in your eye and your vision is just a bit blurred? Well Mine has been like that since Monday and it seems to get worse with the fact that I am sick.

DJ is wanting to get things moved into storage and I just do not have the energy. Not to mention that I'm not real keen on the idea of moving into his mother's basement, but what else are we going to do? I need to get out and start actively looking for work again, but I just don't have the energy.

I'm not sure if the weakness and the eye problem are part of MS, or due to my being so depressed. Probably a mixture of all of it thrown together. Whatever the reason I can not afford to go to the doctor to find out, which causes me that much more anguish and frustration.

Tomorrow will be better.

Weekend Update

The weekend came and went and here we are again, Monday.

Saturday night I met up with Kare Bear and her friends at the Back Porch Saloon for dinner and drinks and catching up. Kare Bear has not changed. Even after not seeing her for over a year, we fell right back into sync. It was just like the days we hung out almost every weekend at the bars. We drank, laughed and drank some more. Kare Bear's friends were there, "Miss Algonquin" (long story) who I adore, and of course "Miss Thang" and her husband, and "Mary Mary" who is expecting her first baby in April; along with some new friends that I had heard about and finally got to meet. Catching up eith everyone and re-living some of our past antics was a lot of fun. It was great to see everyone again. It was a much needed night out.

Sunday, DJ and I began moving some of our boxes and furniture that we are not taking to his mothers into storage. Hard to believe we have so much SHIT! You don't realize how much you have until you have to box it up and start moving it. We moved about 12 boxes, with some bookcases and other small items and we didn't even fill up a corner of the storage bin. We got a 10x20 unit, but I really think there is going to be quite a bit of room left over once we get everything into it. After moving we both were exhausted and spent the rest of the night "vegging" on the couch watching "Indiana Jones" movies.

Back to the real world here on Monday, so back to the want ads...

What's Up for the Weekend

Happy Friday the 13th!

I hope you enjoyed my posting yesterday, my first 12 of 12 posting. I spent a long time getting it together and posting it, but guess what? I forgot to post a link over at Chad's site! All the work for nothing. Well at least you got to read it! See, I told you, I do have a boring life.

But, I actually have plans for the weekend!

Tomorrow night Kare Bear is having a get-together over at the Back Porch Saloon, she and her hubby moved to Savannah back last year and she is coming into town for the weekend and wants to see everyone. So I will be getting out of the house for a while. I think it will do me good to get out and enjoy others company instead of sitting in this half-empty apartment. Kare Bear and I worked together for about four years at the law firm I used to work at. We were let go at the same time. I haven't seen her in quite a long time so I'm looking forward to the "reunion"

Sunday DJ is off and we are going to be packing the majority of our stuff and moving it into the storage bin. All of our living room furniture, dining room suite and boxes that we have packed. That will leave our apartment pretty empty. So for the next few weeks we will be living in an empty apartment. Of course the TV, DVD player and the computer will be the last things we move. A man has to have something to do!

2 Years! & 12 of 12

Today marks my 2 year anniversary on Blogger. Since then I've had over 172,000 hits (actually I just started my hit counter in December 2005) and over 300 postings. Hard to believe I've been blogging over two years. I actually started blogging in May of 2004 on mblog, but they deleted all my postings. So here I am 2 years later still blogging. I know my postings have changed somewhat since I first started and it seems I have a hard time keeping up with any type of monthly post (Like "Man of the Month", "Flashback Thursdays") but I'm going to try it one more time...

12 of 12 was started by a fellow blogger, Chad Darnell and it happens of the 12th of every month. We are to take a photo, every hour for 12 hours of that day and then post those photos with a little explanation as to what we are doing...so for all of you out there that are REALLY interested in how I spend my day here you go...

I usually start my day the same way every morning, the time varies as to when I get out of bed, but today at 10:30 a.m. I was up with my cup of coffee, in my favorite mug at the computer...

Of course after my coffee I go out side for my first smoke of the day, this was me at 11:15a.m.

By 12:15 I am back at the computer, checking any job postings at Career Builder...no nothing.

At 2:40 Xander decided it was time for his nap in an empty box. Me? I'm still at the computer.

3:10 p.m. and the sun has finally decided to shine a little so I go out to the patio and enjoy the sunshine.

DJ has gone to work and before leaving he suggested I pack up the dishes for our impending move, so as the good little house husband, at 5:35 I packed up as much as I could.

After talking to Silver on the phone I decided to throw in a load of wash, it's now about 7:40 and I'm getting a little hungry.

By 8:30 I'm really getting hungry and I remembered we had some left over pizza from Wednesday nights dinner so I warm up some Papa Johns. Just what does it mean by Better Ingredients?

After dinner I had a little energy to do some more packing, so at 8:50 I was finished with the manual labor of the day.

I didn't realize that reading all the blogs on my blogroll took so long, it's now about 9:50 p.m.

After playing SIMS2 for a while creating the Fisher and Sons Funeral home (from Six Feet Under) at 10:40 p.m. I decided to upload my beautiful creation over at ModtheSims, so that others can enjoy my masterpiece

I pop "Alexander" into the DVD and watch Colin Farrell (YUM) and soon DJ is home and it is back to bed to start it all over tomorrow!

Brothers

Tonight is our monthly "Brothers Night Out". My two brothers "CW" & "Deano", my father and myself meet every 10th of the month for a night out. We normally just meet for dinner somewhere and discuss whats been going on during the past month. At first I didn't see the point of doing this, but it is nice to keep up with my brothers and their kids. Before doing this we normally only saw each other maybe three times a year, not including the holidays. And we spoke on the phone even less.

Deano and I were not close as kids, as he is 10 years younger than myself, but now as adults he and I are closer than CW and I. We talk at least once a month besides the monthly dinners, and DJ and I have been to their house and he and his wife have been here. CW is five years younger and we were pretty close as kids, but once I became a teenager we sort of went our own ways. Then when I was a minister our lives were total opposites. Now the roles have been reversed and he is into working in the church and I of course left the church after coming out and my divorce. Needless to say things were pretty tense between CW and I for quite a while. But over the past two years we have reconnected and even though he doesn't agree with what he calls "my choice of lifestyle", we realize that family is more important. When I look at us now I think of that old SHOWTIME series that was on years ago called, "Brothers".

Our parents are growing older, and so are we and they are the only family I have besides my kids, and I'm glad now that we are doing our monthly get togethers.

Six Feet Under

My best friend Silver got me hooked a few years ago on the HBO series, Six Feet Under. We bought the first season for him for Christmas, and then after he watched it we borrowed it and viewed it. It was pretty good, that first year. But not good enough for us to go out and spend $99 for each season for ourselves. (unlike Star Trek, The Next Generation). So we discontinued watching it.

Then a few weeks ago DJ went to our local library and brought the 2nd Season home. Still good, but not quite as entertaining as I remember the first season being. Then last week we went back to the library and got the third season. OMG! It was so depressing! It was the season that Nate,(played by Peter Strauss...hot!) the eldest son was dealing with all of his issues and then the loss of his wife, Lisa, played by Lily Taylor. After watching the entire third season, I had a melt down! Maybe watching such a deep show is not a good thing when you are depressed and unemployed. So I decided to slow down on Six Feet Under and starting watching Smallville again.

Today I ventured back to the dark world of the Fisher Family of Six Feet Under. Thankfully Season 4 was not quite as dark and depressing as season three. They added some more upbeat storylines and added a little more humor. But really how upbeat can a TV show be that starts every week with someone's death? And to think I considered applying for a job at the county coroner's office. Maybe I should just stick with Disney movies. At least until I get back to work.

Starting Over

In 1979 I was given the opportunity to start over, by being pulled from a situation that if left in would have altered my life in ways I can only imagine. Chances are I would not have lived to see this day. I was given a chance to start over.

Twenty-seven years later as I look back on those events and the many other events in my life since that time I wonder how many chances does one get in one lifetime to start over. How many times can we, or others around us change the course of ones life and give them another chance? I’ve had many.

Sometimes it is because a person comes into your life and suddenly things are different and what was important no longer seems that way. That has happened in my life as well. Each time you look at the opportunity with hope and dreams and then another event or person comes into your life and puts another perspective on who and what you are. Then more choices are demanded of you.

Or it could come one day when you are working in a dead end job, just trying to make ends meet and suddenly that job that you despised is taken from you or you walk away from it. Suddenly a job that you thought was taking you nowhere now makes you realize it was your life. Unfortunately you learnt that too late. But just in the nick of time something happens and puts you back on your path, and those lessons are soon forgotten. But then you find yourself in the same situation only under different circumstances and you once again forgot the lesson you learnt from before. The same mistakes are made and choices are placed before you and make the same ones that you made before. Over and over again the cycle continues until you finally learn from your mistake and when the opportunity arises again you make the adjustments and do not make the same choice you made before.

Twenty-seven years ago I had a choice to make and with the help of someone dear to me I was able to make a choice I was afraid to make on my own and it brought me to where I am today. And as I said before, probably saved my life. Eleven years ago, again I was at a crossroad and not willing to make a choice and someone stepped into my life and I chose a path. I chose that path then; thinking they would be there with me through it, but as I found out, that wasn’t the case. So for a few more years, do to that choice that was made, I had to learn another step into the lesson we call life.

Now again today I am living with choices that either I made or others made for me and again I am wondering if I made the right ones. I look back on those others times to see where I may have made the mistake, but honestly I didn’t see them then and now I wonder if I am still not able to distinguish which choices were right and which were wrong. Sometimes it is more difficult to see your own mistakes than those of others around you. Their mistakes are easy to spot. We can sit back and say that if we were in their position we would have done things so much differently. But would we have done anything different if in the same situation with the same choices and emotions involved in that decision? No, I venture to say probably not.

But I finally figured it out. Or in my feeble wisdom, I think I did. Others didn’t make those choices for me, regardless of how much I think they did. They may have influenced me, but ultimately I made those choices. And when I made those choices I made them for what was right for me at that given time. I thought I looked at how it was going to effect my future and my current life and I chose. Ultimately it was I that had to live with the consequences of those actions, not so much the others that were involved or were the influencing factor. But me, the one who made the choice.

We can sit back and look at our life and blame a lost job, a lost opportunity or another individual for our mistakes and even our accomplishments but that is not the case. It is us. It is our own spirit, personality, our drive or whatever we want to call it but ultimately it is ourselves.

So here I am, again at a point in my life where I am dealing with the consequences of my actions and choices, and whether they are good or bad I can only look at myself for the answers. I also can only change the situation by my own efforts. I cannot wait for a knight in shining armor to come and whisk me away, or to sit and wait for the opportunity to fall into my lap by some divine power. I have to make it happen. I have to take control. I have to look deep within myself at my past mistakes and accomplishments and find where that strength is to get me through another cross in the road.

Weighing my options has never been a strong suit for me. When I’ve made choices in my life before I take it head on, sometimes with no thought or even perception of how it is going to effect me or others around me in weeks, months, even years to come. I would say we all are guilty of that. In the heat of a moment, or in the passion of the battle we decide, not thinking about the possible outcomes.

So what were those lessons we learnt from those past choices we made; if thrown into another situation we are going to react the in the same manner because of who we are? I’m not sure, but I think those past lessons play into the scenario even without our conscience mind realizing it. It has been said for every action there is a reaction. But how do we make that reaction without…reacting?

To use the old cliché, life is too short to cry over spilt milk. So I suppose I will make the choice the same way I have before. With what I feel in my heart is right. Giving no thought of what my mind is telling me, and just hope it all works out in the end. Will I use any lessons I learnt before? You bet I will. Will I look back on the decision and say; I wish I would have done that instead? Yes, probably. But you know what? Regardless if it is the right choice, or the wrong one, only one thing is important. Am I a better person because of it? I think we all are. Just as long as we learn. It may not be something we even realized right now that we learnt, but somewhere down the road when the next opportunity arises, or it’s time for the next choice we will remember.

Over the next few weeks DJ and I will be starting over. Due to choices made we are proably going to have to leave our home and move in with his mother to get our finances back on the right track. Have I learnt lessons from this? I certainly hope so because I'm not sure I have too many "starting overs" let in me.

Thirty Days Hath September

Remember that little ditty from school? Thirty days hath September, April, June and November...

Funny how some things you remember like that, but other things you totally forget. Like the name of the really cute kid on my paper route when I was 10. He was a little older than me and every Saturday when I would collect he'd be the one to pay me and with the $1.75 he always gave me a tootsie roll. I am sure his mother gave it to him to give me, but I always wished it was actually him that thought enough of me to give me candy each week. But for the life of me I can not remember his name.

The same way I forgot the name of one of the women that interviewed me on Thursday. The interview went great and at the end I wanted to impress them that I remembered their names, so I said Thank you to each of them calling them by name, except the second girl's name was Bev, not Joyce. They don't even sound alike. I hate it when my mind let's me down like that.

DJ is working from 10-1 this morning and then 5-2 tonight, so I have the Saturday night all to myself. Not that I am looking forward to that, because I'm not. I'd prefer him to be home with me while I sit on the computer...no really I am not going to complain, I am just thankful that one of us is working. So I suppose I will spend the rest of my Saturday writing.

So how many days does September have?

New Pictures

Hey go over and check out my new pictures of the grandkids on FLICKR. I have a link to my site on the left hand side of the blog. And while you are over there click the link to Lulu.com and buy my books, that is if you haven't done so already. You know you want to.

Total Disregard

What is it with these companies that spend the money to place an ad; hire a staff called Human Resources; hold interviews paying this staff to interview potential employees; have a background check done on a potential employee and then after all this expense fail to return potential employees calls or e-mail??

Can you tell I'm just a wee bit upset?

Well not really upset.
Just extremely frustrated.

A week ago Monday had an interview (and you know my feelings regarding those) with the local cable company for a position in their customer service department. My appointment was at 9:00 a.m., I arrived at 8:40. I waited over an hour before the interviewer arrived. She was obviously unprepared. (no pencil, not even a pad of paper). She found the writing utensils and put me in a room, which by the way looked like a storage closet with a table in it, and conducted an interview asking predetermined questions from a script she had in front of her. The complete interview lasted about 20 minutes. She explained to me that if the HR department felt they didn't need my services that I would be sent a postcard stating just that. If I did not receive that postcard I was to call her office the following Monday to follow up. I never received the postcard and now I have left four messages on this woman's answering machine and two e-mails requesting her to let me know if they would like me to come back for another interview or what. I still have not even been given the decency of a return call or e-mail. And what is so bad is that this is the second company I have interviewed for that has treated me in such a callous manner.

How totally unprofessional! Would one want to work for a company so rude and unprofessional? Well not really but I need the job. They could at least CALL ME BACK!

But all is well, as I have another interview tomorrow with a government agency. Let's see if they do any better. I doubt it as I sent my application to them over two months ago and just now received a call for an interview.

At this rate, I am bound to have a job before the year ends

Clearing My Head

If you recall I told you the other day about all the time I had on my hands and all the mundane things I do to fill that time. Well I began to think about all the time I was wasting on things that were not all that important. I mean I enjoy blogging but do I really need 7 of them? No one reads them anyway, right? So I cleaned house. I now only have three blogs and they are all under one account. I have Reality Check, which I will probably never get rid of, even though I have said on numerous occasions that I was closing it, just to reappear. I like blogging about my life, even if it isn't all that interesting to others, it is therapeutic for me.

The other two blogs, A Reality Past, is a compilation of research that I have been doing since 1980. It is my genealogy. My family tree. Some of my family members have wanted me to put all the information that I have researched into book form. But I find that very tedious, so instead I have started posting family bios via blogger. That way they can get the information they want and even copy the pictures that I have found and gathered over the last 26 years.
My other obsession is movies. All kinds of movies. I love the old ones, the classics, the bad ones and current ones. So what does one do with that kind of obsession? They blog about it. That is what Cinemania! is about. So if any of those interest you feel free to check them out.

So by eliminating 4 blogs and keeping only three I think I am in the right direction in freeing all this time I have on my hands. Plus, hopefully I will find out if I get that job I interviewed for on Monday by next week so my time spent blogging will be limited after that. It's a good thing. Trust me! Also by eliminating those blogs I feel I have more time for my other obsession, writing. Who knows maybe now that I have restructured these un-important details of my life I can work on the important ones.

That's a scary thought.

Good news on the finance front. DJ got a job!! Yes, he is returning to the ever-exciting world of serving tables. He has worked in the service industry before and enjoys it. Not only that, he is GOOD at it. He has the knack, the patience and the personality it requires to be a good server. It takes a special kind of person to serve tables, and Lord knows I'm not that type of person. DJ on the other hand is a pro. Due to these skills he always made excellent tips. This news came just in time, as we received a notice today from our rental company. It's time to renew our lease. I was being a bit hesitant about that due to being unemployed, but now we can stay here!! I really do not want to move again, at least not for a while. All we need now is for that call on Monday saying that I too will join the ranks of the gainfully employed.

Happy Anniversary

Friday will mark the 6th Anniversary that DJ & I first met. 6 Years! WOW, it seems like yesterday. I know I say that all the time, but it sure does not seem like six years. Now six years later, three cats, several moves, a few arguments, even fewer fights, several employment issues, a massive DVD library and 2 grand kids later we are still going and growing strong

DJ was at the right place at the right time. Or I should say I was at the right place at the right time, because he changed my life that night. And every day since then I have become a better person because of that cute guy sitting in the corner of the bar, all alone, in that sexy unbuttoned shirt. I asked him to dance, and I knew right then that this guy could not get away.

Thank you again to Kare Bear and Bri for taking me out that night. If it wasn't for you two insisting to go out I may have never met my best friend, my soul mate, my partner and my strength. Thanks DJ for being patient and allowing me to tear down those walls and let you in.

To all of you guys out there still looking, it can happen. And to all of you out there that do not think a committed gay monogamous relationship can last more than 6 months to a year, I am here to say I know better.

And to DJ... I love you more!

Too Much Time On My Hands

I have really got to get a job! I have WAY too much time on my hands. I now have 7 different blogs that I write, two flickr accounts that I maintain, and 6 e-mail accounts. Not to mention that I have been writing like mad since I opened my account on Lulu.com. Plus I also signed up for two online survey accounts. I am sure DJ is tired of the time I spend on the computer doing really NOTHING.

Well I do have a routine. Every morning I get up and check my e-mail, and then I check the job postings on the three accounts I have, careerbuilder.com; monsterjobs.com and jobsonline.com and then post my resume. So I am at least doing something pertinent.

I talked to a friend tonight and found out that the relationship that they had been in for the last three years is over. They have went their separate ways and divided their things and have called it quits. Now they are starting over, again. I know how hard that is and I feel for them and hope that things will look up soon. They have told me they are ready to have some quality time with themselves and not get into another relationship right away. I hope that they do.

Speaking of time, where has September gone!? It is already the 20th of the month. I can not believe how fast it is going. It is going to be Christmas before we know it! Well I have to go, I just heard a ding on the computer and I have to check and see what e-mail account has new mail. Or maybe someone bought another one of my books on Lulu, or possibly I have another survey to take....

Deje Vu

You would think at my age, and as many jobs that I have had that I would not be as anxious as I am concerning my interview tomorrow. I've spoke of my position about interviews here before. I'm not a fan of them. I really do not think interviews are an applicable tool in determining a potential employee. But regardless of my own opinion that is what employers use to gauge if they want a person on their payroll. My interview is at 9:00 a.m. tomorrow so keep your fingers crossed!

Last night Silver and his son came over to join DJ and my two sons in a night of D&D. We have been playing D& D now over a year and I think I have always been the dungeon master each time we have played. Most of the dungeons I have played I have found on the Internet. A couple I have written myself. Last night we began playing the dungeon and it seemed rather familiar to me, but we continued. Finally about four hours into the game we all realized..."We've done this before!" So not to make the entire night and game a squander I mixed up what remaining time was left with two or three other dungeons and finished our game. I gave the players extra experience points due to my poor memory.

I've had three sales so far on my books at LuLu.com, so I am looking for the rest of you that I sent e-mails to purchase them fairly soon!! Honestly though I am surprised at the hits I've had already in just a few short days. I've had over 25 hits on my page at Lulu, so at least someone is looking at what I have to offer. Now if they would just buy the books.

Another weekend has come and gone, and fall is creeping in quicker than I really want it to. I love the autumn but winter is right behind it, and winter is not one of my favorite seasons. Tonight and last night it was cool enough for us to shut off our air conditioning and I am sure within a few days or weeks it will be turned off for the year. Then the heat will have to be turned on. YUCK!
We have been here over a year now. (That in itself is hard to believe.) But our electric bills have been very acceptable. Hopefully this year will be more of the same.

I used to do this quite a bit, but haven't featured a fellow blogger in a while. If you like reading blogs, check out LOVE LEMMING. I've been reading his blog for quite some time now and enjoy finding out what is going on in his life. Plus he is a SIMS2 freak like me! He has recently moved to Portland, so go see what he is blogging about!

Again, wish me luck tomorrow; I will post an update when I hear anything.

Looking Up

Things seem to be moving in a new direction around here the last two or three days. I received a response from my resume and had a phone interview last night and a person-to-person on Monday. It is with the local cable company so I would also receive free cable and Internet service in my benefit package. Hell that alone is worth it!

As I mentioned on Wednesday, I have published some of my work on Lulu.com for distribution. So far I've had several hits on my site three and have three book purchases! All that in less than 48 hours of posting my work. So lets hope this continues. I wasn't sure about self publishing, but Lulu.com has a very simple procedure and very cost effective. If you are interested is getting your work out there for others to see you may want to check them out.

Due to the response I have received from my book postings I have been working on some of the other work that I had put aside. I have been writing for over 15 or twenty years just as a way to release stress. Some of the works were just a page or two, but others were full compositions. Not edited of course, so I have been going through my database and notebooks working on editing and completing some of my writings. I added a third book just last night for purchase on Lulu.com

If you would like to read my work I have put a link on the right hand side of my blog. Just hit that link and it will take you to Lulu.com and put my books into your cart for purchase. Thanks in advance!

Other than that everything has been somewhat quiet around here. I'd say things are looking up.

I'm Published!

Over three years ago I started blogging to help me overcome my writer's block. I never really got over the block, and now I have 7 blogs...But

I published my first two books. It is not what I envisioned my books to be, but hey they are out there. Now for the small price of only $3.25 per book you can download my words onto your computer for your reading enjoyment.

I've been writing for most of my adult life and I've never actually even let anyone read what I've written, except for a couple of people. Now it's online for anyone who wants to read it. I also have several books I've started but never finished, and maybe now that I have actually put something out there I will have the drive to finish them and publish them as well.

They are e-books and you can find them here...REALITY CHECK.

Who knows, if these go over well maybe I will actually use Lulu.com to really publish them into a hardback book and send them out to bookstores. And if it goes even better maybe I can call a screenwriter and see if maybe I can make a movie based on my short stories.

Now who would I want to play me??? hmmmmm

Memories

The weekend went off without any problems. My night of babysitting was good. Rylan decided to sleep until 4:00 a.m. and then woke ready to eat. He is definitely a morning baby. He woke up in a good mood, smiling and cooing. At 4:00 a.m.! He definitely doesn't take back after grandpa.

The rest of the weekend was kind of quiet. DJ worked Saturday and then we had a nice dinner and watched TV. Sunday was more of the same, watching TV, talking to my youngest brother who turned 37 on Sunday, and having a nice quiet dinner. We played some scrabble Sunday evening (I was beat twice, but only by one point the first game) and then some "Smallville" and off to bed.

Today being 9-11, I really don't want to watch the TV, and just don't want to relive all that horror, so I suppose I will clean house and job hunt.

I remember that day very vividly. I was at work and had went into the break room for some coffee and a couple of girls were in there saying that a plane had just hit the World Trade Center. Of course we thought at first it was just an accident but then as the dram began to unfold we realized this was not an accident. Within 15 minutes the break room was at full capacity and work came to a halt throughout the office. It was just so surreal.

Isn't it amazing how our minds seem to store those kind of events in our minds with perfect clarity? I also remember the day Elvis died. I was at the Ohio State Fair for the week with the Ohio State Choir and heard it on the news. The first thing I did was call my mother. She was an avid Elvis fan. We cried together.

Or the day that Bobby Kennedy was shot? I was outside on our front porch talking with a neighbor kid and mom came out and told us to come inside. We sat in front of the TV watching the events unfold. Or the day Martin Luther King was killed? I was at school and we were sent home early. I remember teachers crying as they loaded us onto the buses. We had no idea what was happening until we got home. Of course I was really too young to understand who he was and the importance of his work, but I do remember mom saying that it would never be the same now.

Those days that mark history, mark our minds with memories of tragedy and horror. But then I think about those that were there. I was safe at work that day in September, miles away from ground zero. But those that were there that lived through it, that suffered a loss of dreams and hopes that day. There memories will be much more real than mine were that day. The effect of those days events will forever be part of their lives too, but in a much more horrific sense than I could even begin to imagine.

Memories.
My first weekend with my grandson. I prefer those kind of long lasting memories in my heart and mind. But we also have to remember those events in our lives that were not so pleasant to understand what life is all about.

Our heart goes out to those that lost loved ones that day. As all our lives changed after 9-11, their lives were shattered.

Grandpa Reality

Well it is now official. I am officially a real Grandpa. I know I was one on June 15, and August 11, but today I had my first taste of grandfathering. I picked up my grandson at noon today and he is staying the night with grandpa and DJ.

Now you have to remember the last time I was with a baby for that long of a time was when my youngest AT was a baby. He is now 13. And then his mother was just a few feet away. DJ worked today so I was on my own until about 5:30. It wasn't bad. Rylan and I watched The Emperor's New Groove, Shrek and Shrek 2. He had three bottles and one "poopy" diaper. He even had a little nap. All was good.

After DJ got home we had dinner and then went to see DJ's sister play softball. Of course my grandson stole the show, and all the girls on the team had to hold him. So all was well there. One of the girls on the team even changed his diaper for me and fed him. Now I know why all these straight single guys like taking their nieces and nephews out with them. They are great girl "magnets!' Then we got back home about 9ish, and at 10:00 all hell broke loose.

Rylan began crying and screaming and nothing either DJ or I did seemed to help. Finally I took him into my arms, held him close and began rocking him, within 5 minutes he was asleep. I think someone at home has this guy spoiled! So he is fast asleep in his little vibrating baby chair, and I am sitting here on pins and needles waiting for that heart wrenching scream to start over.

Hopefully he will sleep until his next feeding which is due at midnight and then I pray he will sleep through the night. I promised to do this for them once a month so that they can have some time with just each other. But before the next visit to grandpa, I think I'm going to have a little talk with them about how they should not spoil him. Or at least give me a heads up on how he likes to go to sleep.

All in all I have enjoyed this immensely. With my own kids I was so busy working and doing all those other things when I was married I really didn't get the chance to be as much hands on as I would have liked to be. This way I can be hands on as much as I want to be and then hand them back to mommy and daddy...

Thinking Out Loud

Not too much to talk about today. I mean what is there to tell when all I do is sit in front of the computer all day either looking for work, reading blogs or playing Sims2?

I do know that this has to end, SOON! DJ is becoming less patient with me, not that he has said anything, but after living with someone as long as we have lived together, you begin to know them.

I've thought about something the last few days. I've been thinking about my life prior to my coming out. Most of my readers know of my past and what I did for a living back then. Why couldn't I go back into the ministry? I mean I was an ordained minister, and pastored a fairly large congregation. Which I loved, by the way. I was also very blessed in my ministry. I saw the last church I was in go from about 50 active members to over 150 active members in less than two years. Plus I have several years of education under my belt, so I am qualified.

Just because I came out and chose to live my life as who I really am, why should I be denied the ability to work in the church. I know, there are not many denominations that would allow me to be a "working" minister, but why not? It was something I loved, something I was good at, and something that benefited others as well as myself. And to be honest the pay wasn't bad either. I guess in an Utopian society this may be a possibility, but in our society as it is today I guess I need to just keep plugging away at Job Builder.com and see what is a real possibility.

I know...I need to get a reality check.

Leave Suri Alone

Throughout the blogger world today almost everywhere I landed I heard about the pictures of Suri Cruise...and every one's comments about this beautiful little baby girl.

No I am not posting a picture, there are tons of sites where you can find them. I just do not understand all the hoopla over this little girl's picture. And all the speculation if she is really Tom Cruise's baby.

Who really cares?

I posted pictures of my kids and grand kids on here for the sole purpose to share my joy with others. Not that some of my readers really care or even wanted to see them, but mainly because I am proud of my kids and grand kids. I didn't post them for people to speculate about who they are, who is really the REAL parents of them, or for others to make rude comments about them. (not that any of this has happened, I'm not Tom Cruise I guess).

I guess what I am saying is, yes we all know that Tom has pretty much turned into a nut case, and I'm not defending his actions or statements, but why take it out on this poor innocent baby? Regardless if she is or isn't Tom's biological child, she is still a child.

Let's leave the baby out of this.

BEEP!

Ah, Labor Day weekend. Relax and just do nothing.
Oh, that's what I've BEEN doing for almost two months now.

Last night DJ and I decided to sit back and enjoy some TV and one another's company. At around 11:30 we decided to call it a night and go to bed. Early for me, late for him. Then it happened....

BEEP!

A loud beep came from somewhere. What was it? Where did it come from?

About 40 seconds later...

BEEP!

Oh, okay it's the smoke alarm. No problem, that is it's way of warning us it is time to change the battery.

We have no 9 volt batteries in the house???
It's 11:30 p.m. there is no where open to buy any 9 volt batteries except for the convenience store by the house where we would pay $5 for one battery.

So what did we do? No we didn't disconnect it, because if you do it sends a warning to the main office of the complex through the alarm system letting them know that we disconnected the fire alarm, which is against the law.

We just let it BEEP!
All night long.
Every 40-45 seconds.

As soon as the Dollar Store opened DJ was there getting 9 volt batteries.

Fall Is On It's Way

Well, after four days of a flu-like illness I am finally almost back to normal. Whatever normal is. I've spent the last three days lying in bed and taking cold medicine. Fun huh?

But today is a new day and the beginning of a new month. Attitude is in check, mind-set is set to positive and hopefully things will change for the better. Fall is on it's way, and that is one of my favorite times of the year. I applied for several more jobs on-line and I am sure I will be getting a call in the next few days for more interviews.

So it's now September. By the way, does anyone know where the summer went?

Trying To Be Positive

Trying to stay positive and upbeat is becoming increasingly more difficult, and I know my blog postings have suffered the same fate as my present mindset. You would think living in a major metropolitan area, that I'd have no problem finding a job, but it has now been almost two months. Maybe I'm looking in the wrong places? I've posted my resume on Job Builder, MonsterJob and Career Builder, and only had a few bites. Maybe I'm looking for something beyond my reach? Without a degree it seems the jobs that I am wanting are just beyond my fingertips. Why didn't I go to school when I had the chance?

I can sit back and regret my decisions that I made as a young man just out of High School or I can get off my ass and start being a little more aggressive. Plus feeling sorry for myself is really non-productive. I mean I caused this situation I am in. What sane man in his right mind would walk away from a 28k a year job with nothing to fall back on?

On another note, my grand babies are getting so big already. Justice weighs over 11 pounds and Alana is well on her way to the same. Both parents are doing well, and everyone seems happy. I should be happy for them, and I am. My youngest boys started off the new school year with a positive outlook and they both are actually looking forward to their school year. That's a first! By the way check out my Flickr page, there is a link on the left hand side of this site, just click on it and it wil take you to my photos of the grandkids.

So as I look at my situation, I should realize that I'm doing pretty good. I am blessed with four great kids, two wonderful grandchildren, a great partner that is the most patient loving man I could imagine and a handful of friends and family that are looking out for us.

Who am I to complain anyway!

Rejection

Three interviews, three rejections. I never knew trying to find employment would be so difficult. Why did I quit my job? I was being paid very well, and did very little. I know I had to deal with the bitch from hell and her psycho son everyday, but at least I had a job!

What is worse is we have received word from the Unemployment Office that DJ's unemployment will run out in two weeks. That mean no income coming into our home, at all!

At this point I don't know what we are going to do. I guess just keep looking and hoping that those rejections turn into acceptance. This is worse than it was when I was looking for a boyfriend! At least then I was able to go to the bar and order a drink to help alleviate the pain of rejection.

Intervention?

How do you intervene into a situation when the person you are trying to help by the intervention doesn't think they have a problem? I've heard it before regarding people with addictions, that they don't realize they have a problem. I remember my own cousin telling me how he was making money by the handfuls, and felt better than he had in years, but all the while his entire body was being ravaged by the the effects of crystal meth. He died before he was 40.

Well it's not someone with a drug problem that worries me, nor do they have a drinking problem. Hell for that matter they are healthier than I am, except for one small detail. They keep forgetting. Not just forgetting where she laid her keys or misplaced her purse, but conversations, phone calls, bill paying. My mother it seems is getting worse by the week, and she doesn't seem to think she has a problem. Her short term memory is fading quickly. Now you ask her something that happened 25, 30 or even 50 years ago and she can give you intimate details. But she can not remember a phone conversation she had five minutes ago. And her moods change drastically, in a second. Then she gets upset because of her actions.

Finally my brothers agree with what I have been saying for over a year, and now so does Dad. I am not a doctor, but I believe she has the first stages of Alzheimer's. Her mother had it, and also her great grandmother. So Dad said something to the doctor, (as they have the same family medical doctor), about how she has been and the things she has been doing. Hopefully we did something soon enough. I know that there is no cure, but medicines have improved since my grandmother was diagnosed in the late 80's.

What hurts the most is that mother doesn't understand why we are doing this. She doesn't think it is necessary. But if it isn't Alzheimer's then something is wrong and it's not just an age thing. She gets upset and almost angry if we mention it to her. I have told her several times to mention these things to the doctor and she just ignores me and blows it off. Mother is a very intelligent woman, she knows how this disease works, and therein lies the problem. She seen her mother succumb to the effects of this disease.

No it is not fair, and it is heart wrenching to even think about, but the reality of it is...It's all part of this thing we call life. The good with the bad. Mother can get mad at all of us if she wants. But intervene we did. And it is intervention, not "butting our noses" where we don't belong.

Vampires

I am a huge fan of Anne Rice. I've read her Vampire Chronicles at least 3 times and have just started my third reading of her Mayfair Witches series. I am also a huge fan of SIMS2, as most of you know that read my pages. Well I found the ultimate way to waste my time! It is called the Mayfair Challenge. It is a challenge for SIMS2 players combined with the Mayfair legacy from Anne Rice's books. The challenge is to create 10 families. The Mayfair Family and 9 other "Origin" families and then by following the rules provided here, you must inter-marry into each of the families until all 10 have a descendant that is a Mayfair. But enough of that...

Speaking of Vampires though, I have always been a vampire enthusiast. Not to the point where I really believe that there are real vampires out there as the fokelore states. Yes, I do believe that there are probably people out there that "think" they are vampires but not like Bela Lugosi's Count Dracula.

Think about it though, being a vampire would be, as they say, awesome. You live forever, an immortal. Yes, you have to do that by killing others and drinking their blood, but as Anne Rice's Vampires do, you could kill only the "evil doer". Live hundreds of years, never aging or becoming sick. Forever young. Well if you were lucky enough to be turned at a young age, that is. Not sure if I would want to be changed at my current age. Now maybe about 8 or 9 years ago, yeah. I was younger, less wrinkles and fat. Could you imagine it though. Living forever. But not like the vampires of old, you know the killing, murdering, blood sucking vampires we mostly think about and learnt about. I want to be the vampire with a soul, like Angel from Buffy the Vampire Slayer or Lestat, from the Anne Rice novels.

As I used to think about it, I would be lost in the magic of it, but in reality it would be horrible. Living forever that is. Everyone you know and love (your family, children, friends) would all die and you would have to watch it. Not only that but after a while when you look younger than your own grandchildren you would have to go into hiding or disappear and fake your own death. If not people would know you were an immortal. So ultimately as Anne Rice's hero, Lestat, you would be alone. Completely alone. No thanks, I couldn't bare eternity alone.

So for now I'll just read the books and play the SIMS2 and be happy with my own mortality.

By the way, you like the new look? I finally found a blog template that I really like. It's me. I've always got my head in the clouds and a cop of coffee is always close by.

No Excuse

It's been almost a week since my last post, and I offer no excuses. Just nothing really going on. To be honest, I'm getting a bit bored with my blog, but I am going to continue to post, if not for my own retrospective moments. I like to go back to previous postings and see what I was doing this time last year. But with that said...

Things are going pretty slow around here, especially on the job front. I've had three interviews and had my second interview with a potential employer on Tuesday. At first I was a little intimidated with this company. It's a bank, and I have never really worked in finance, and I'm not real good with numbers. But after my second interview on Tuesday I felt much more comfortable, and I really hope they call me. It pays well and there is great potential for better opportunities. The banking world seems to be a totally different world than what I am used to, and I think I'm up for the challenge.

The ear infection continues to linger. For several nights I was unable to sleep due to the pain, but finally it seems to be subsiding and my precious sleep is not being interrupted as often. I also purchased some ear plugs, so I can also return to the pool. I just have to get the energy to do so. I'm not sure if it is a lack of energy or just a lack of wanting to do anything. I've become almost a recluse, going out only when I have to. I sit inside and read, play on the computer and look for work. My depression is getting the best of me, so I hope for a job soon. If not DC is going to be throwing me out to the wolves, as I know my moods are driving him mad.

Spent the evening with Princess tonight and my new grand-daughter. She is so precious. Her skin is flawless, so pure and almost porcelain like. And her eyes! They are just beautiful. It's hard to believe she will be a week old tomorrow.

Well that's it for now. Hopefully the call will come tomorrow about the job. Keep your fingers crossed!

Grandpa Again!

I was blessed again today with yet another beautiful grandchild. My daughter, Princess gave birth by caesarian section, a beautiful baby girl.

They named her months ago, Alana Mae, and she was born today August 11th at 8:11 p.m. and weighed in at 6lbs. 4ozs. and was 19 inches long.


Both mommy and baby are doing great, and will be home by Sunday. She has strawberry blonde hair and blue eyes. She looks a lot like her daddy (unfortunately) but she still has a lot of her mommy's features. Like dimples and her eyes.

As you can see I'm a little excited in this picture!

Interview-2 Earache-3

I going on another interview this morning. This is my first interview with this company and my second interview all together. Only two interviews in one month, I need to step up my efforts a bit.

This is also the third night in a row, I've had little or no sleep thanks to the alien that is growing in my left ear. I'm eating advil for the pain, and DJ did go and get me some drops last night. They seemed to have helped a bit, but now the entire canal is swollen, so it's hard for the drops to penetrate to the infection.

So off to the interview, I hope this guy has a loud voice, otherwise I will not be able to hear the interview questions.