Cheek Implants & Advice to the Love Lorn

This is the third time today that I have started a post to my blog. Each time I was interupted and decided to wait. Now it's late, I'm tired and I forgot what I was going to write about anyway. So instead I visited my site stats. An interesting little tool. Since I've been blogging (almost a year now) I've had three different sites, all with the same name but with a different host. First I jumped onto angelfire. I was new to the blogging thing and had no idea what it was all about, so don't hold it against me. Then I moved to mblog, which just one day decided to no longer offer the service, taking all of my data. Then I moved to Blogger, which I must say is outstanding. But in total I have had over 6,000 hits. Not too bad. But not too good. But anyway, as I was looking at my stats today I found something very strange. I have the ability to check what people are searching for when they happen to run across my blog. It seems that someone in Finland was doing a search for cheek implants and google linked them to my Dec. 10, 2004 post. How in the hell did they get cheek implants out of that? So what did I do? I went to google and searched cheek implants. I found 96,800 hits for cheek implants. No I did not go through all of them, but I didn't find a link back to Reality Check. But can someone give me some idea how anyone got cheek implants out of that posting? So whoever you are over there in Finland looking for cheek implants...good luck with that!

How do you heal a broken heart? No, not me. But I had to listen to a grown man wallow in self pity and doubt today for over an hour because some girl ditched him. It was DJ's uncle, and I was a captive audience. Not that I wanted to be mind you, but I was working and he came in. He didn't preface the conversation with anything he just started with...
"So that girl I thought was really hot ditched me today."
First of all I can not imagine why anyone would ditch him. I mean he wears the latest fashions of 1978, including his hairstyle. He wears the same outfit at least three times a week and there is so much cat hair on his clothes he may be mistaken for one. He is 41 and has never had a job and his mom still washes his clothes, does his laundry, cleans his apartment and gives him an allowance!! Any woman in their right mind would be crazy not to hold onto a man like that! He went on and on and on about how this girl just fucked him over. Then he says to me...

"If you saw her you'd understand too. She is a hot chick, you would fall for her the instant you saw her!"

Uh, No. First of all I don't think ANYONE uses the term "hot chick" anymore and I don't do girls, I do your nephew. I finally called my boss and begged to leave early. She gave me the okay, as she had heard the entire story the night before and felt my pain.

My advice to you Uncle Dave is;
1) Get a job
2) Get a real haircut.
3) Buy some new clothes (at Banana Republic or Old Navy, not the Salvation Army)
4) Quit hitting on 19 year old girls who already have three kids and two ex husbands.
5) Actually, just don't leave the house...EVER.