10 Years, Where are We Now?

I just realized today while at work that 2005 will be my 10th Anniversary since I came out. Ten years! WOW, where did it go? A lot has happened in the past ten years that is for sure. Some things I prefer to forget (the whole mattress thing) and others I could never forget (like my commitment service to DJ the and trips to Atlanta, Savannah, Chicago, Indy and Florida ).
As I thought about the past ten years I also thought about the people that I have known in these past ten years. Some are gone, like Trace who died after his battle with HIV for 15 years. Some are still around, like a bad penny they keep popping up! And as some of the events of the past ten years, there are people I would like to forget ( the one night stand that I threw up all over after we had sex...) and some that will always be there, DJ, Veruca and Silver.

This picture shows some of those people. This is not a 10 year old picture, but a picture taken New Years Eve 1998. There is Veruca back row center. He and I came out together, and soon we were sleeping together. Veruca and I have been through it all. coming out to family, sharing our first place together as a gay couple, hitting the gay scene in Cincinnati. You name it we did it together. But, I learnt that friends are one thing, lovers are another. Even though our relationship has changed over the past ten years we still are close and he is one of my dearest friends.
Then there is Silver Fox (to the left of Veruca in the pic). At first he and I did not see things quite the same way...well maybe we did. We both were in love with Veruca. That caused for some intense moments. But over the past ten years he and I are closer than ever and I love him dearly. We've been through a lot together as well and I cherish his friendship.
Our group of friends was quite diverse in those days and the one who seemed to know everyone and everything was our very own Nathan Lane, the Queen of our group (he's the one front and center with the mustache in the pic) He introduced Veruca and I to all the gay bars and the gay men in the city. Even the ones to be-friend and the ones to stay away from. He was the one that actually introduced us to Silver. Talk about drama though!! It seemed to follow him, or maybe he just made it himself. Never a dull moment with him around that was for sure. Last I heard he adopted his nephew and moved to Key West and has recently moved back to Cincy.
We also had our very own "gay" Dr. Phil. (center row, first on the left) He had an opinion on everything and was always willing to share it whether we wanted it or not. Many times very good avice, but we seldomed listen to it. Maybe if I had I could have saved myself from a lot of the pain and agony I brought upon myself. He was also very active in the gay community, volunteering at the AIDS Center and working to make sure that all the gay community was registered and voted. The first time I went to the clinic to be tested for HIV it was with him. we also roomed together for awhile, but since then I've not seen him. Last I heard he was venturing into Real Estate and dungeons.
Then there were others, I call bit players like the beautiful blonde female, she had the greatest set of breasts on any woman I'd met up to that point! She also had that quick sarcastic bitchy humor that would cut a man in half if need be. My first real experience with a" fag hag". Our first Halloween party, she and I came as Adam and Eve. That was a treat!!
Then there was the little boy and his daddy boyfriend. He is the cute little latino looking thing standing next to Veruca. He was about 19 or 20 and his boyfriend (not pictured) was about 50 and married...to a woman. (Now you know the reason why he wasn't pictured). They dated for about another year after that party and daddy found someone younger. Last I heard he had some 19 year old he brought over here from the middle east. As for the little boy he is doing well in Tennessee. Moved away and finished school and has a real boyfriend from what I've heard.
Then there was me...(center row 2nd from the left) Fresh in the gay community and wanting to make up for lost time. I mean most of our friends had been out since childhood! I was 35 (old by gay standards) and just coming out of the closet. there was so much to do (and so many to do!) I was a mess!! I went through that "queeny" phase, you know where you think you have to be like all the stereotypical queers that you've heard about or seen on TV. I was dubbed "Jack" as in Will & Grace, for a long time because of that. It was also before the gray settled in (thanks to clariol) and I was still so vain I thought everyone was talking about me and before I met DJ. I was looking for the perfect man and it took me a long time (5 years) but I finally found him. It's true what they say too, when you stop looking so hard you'll find the one. That was what happened to me. When I settled on the fact that I was destined to remain single and I quit worrying about finding a boyfriend, I met DJ.
Yeah, a lot has happened in the last ten years. A lot of fun, a lot of tears, a lot of sex(both good and bad) and many people have crossed my path. I have no regrets. It's been a good first decade of being "OUT" and I would not have changed a thing. So Happy Anniversary to ME!! I can't wait to see what the next ten years brings!