Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Avoiding the Holidays

November is now here. I suppose that it is now officially the Holiday Season, well if you are in retail. Unlike some people, like my friend SILVER, instead of looking forward to Christmas, I'm trying to find ways to avoid it. It's not that I don't like Christmas. Everyone knows I'm a true "Monica" and I LOVE getting gifts, and it's not that I'm a non-believer, as I do believe. I just don't believe in all the hype that seems to go with the Christmas Season. There are already commercials on TV. I went to Meijer last night to get a deal on left over Halloween candy and the displays had already been replaced. With, you guessed it, CHRISTMAS DISPLAYS!

So how do you avoid Christmas? Well don't get me wrong, I'm not a Scrooge, but here are some key plans to avoid the Christmas hubbub;

1. Shop NOW, (or even earlier) don't wait until after thanksgiving, because there are nothing in the stores but crazy people after Thanksgiving. They will fight, maul and destroy you. Not to mention the traffic around the malls. Avoid them at any costs.
2. Shop Online. No mess, no traffic and no crazy people to contend with.
3. Make gifts. There is noting more special than a handmade or home made gift. DJ has taken up crotcheting and he is giving scarves, hats and afghans for gifts this year.
4. Give Money. Avoid all the malls and online shopping, just give cash. I LOVE getting cash
5. Decorate in Moderation: Put out the decorations about December 22, take them down December 26. Or even better, don't put them out at all. Well maybe just a wreath on the door so your neighbors don't think your first name is Ebeneezer.
6. Vacation: Take a Month long vacation. Nothing says I love Christmas better than being in Maui or Key West.
7. Avoid Radio & TV: Stop plying your radio in the car. If not you will be bombarded with Christmas music and advertisements. Put in your new Madonna CD when you are in the car. Think Kabbalah!! And instead of TV, watch those DVD's.
8. Become Jewish; Hanukkah! This way you have more days to get gifts without all the fanfare of Christmas. It's more quiet, reserved and thoughtful celebration. Plus we all love the candles.
9. Change Religions:If you don't want to become Jewish there is always atheism. But you get NO gifts that way.
10. Just keep your Halloween decorations up. Then everyone will think you are a Satanist or something. I mean there are some people that leave their Christmas Decorations up all year round, why not Halloween?

I guess there really is no way to avoid Christmas when you think about it. Just accept the fact that we are a commercial society and Christmas is no longer the sacred celebration that it was meant to be. I guess my friend Silver has the best way to look at it. Just enjoy it, celebrate it, revel in it. If you can't beat it, join it.

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