Dead Days

Today is DEAD. I mean in the work sense. I haven't seen a customer almost all day! DJ is swimming at his mother's with AT and J2. SO at least they are having some fun. Dead days? What does one do with themselves when there is nothing to do. Not that I don't have things that I could do, but doing data entry for 8 hours is mind numbing. I can't get on the internet and check out pictures of hot men, the boss is here. So it is either do the data entry or play solitaire.

It's sweltering outside, over 95 degrees for the fourth day in a row. Summer came in a fury this year. We have had record heat already and it's not even July yet. So of course going outside is out of the question. So I'll post my entry and get back to the data entry....

Where, Oh Where Are You Tonight?

First of all I want to thank everyone for the e-mails and comments regarding my brother Gary's Open Heart Surgery. He is coming home today and is doing very well. Better than even the doctors expected. Thanks for the well wishes.

Now on for the posting for today; Last night I decided I wanted to go out. (See my post from last week). So DJ, Silver and I headed out for a night on the town. We went to Hamburger Mary's for dinner. Hamburger Mary's came to Cincinnati about three years ago, and has gained quite a following. But the crowd last night was very small. We found out that it was Pride Weekend in Columbus, hence the small crowd. We decided to go to PIPELINE for, after dinner drinks, only to find out that they had been shut down. The rumor mill has it that they got busted for serving minors. But when we went by the bar there was an eviction sign on the front door. So we then decided to go to our usual hang-out, SPURS. We found out that they had also been shut down, for lack of payment towards their electric bill. WOW, two major gay bars in Cincinnati, shut down. What in the hell was going on?? Of course everyone has their own opinion as to why. Is it the conservative city of Cincinnati shutting them down by finding anything they can to do so? Or could it be that the gay community in Cincinnati has turned against the gay business owners and headed to the straight bars instead? Or could it be that the gay community like DJ and myself, just do not go out anymore, causing the bars to not be able to keep their head above water? Who knows but for whatever reason, it's sad to see a large metropolitan city, such as Cincinnati have two, well known gay bars shut down.

We wound up going to Clifton, which is just about 4 miles north of downtown to GOLDEN LIONS for our night out. Which actually turned out pretty good, as they were having a benefit for the Health Resource Center in Cincinnati and we bought raffle tickets. I won a fabulous "kitty t-shirt" (Check out the original artist's work HERE) and Silver won a very beautiful boa. So the night was not a total loss. We had fun and went home with parting gifts.

But, if we will, let's go back to the gay community in Cincinnati. What is going on? After talking to a few of the bar patrons, it seems that even the Pride Events this year was not supported as heavily as years in the past. Even though there were record breaking crowds along the parade route, the actual sponsors were not as many. From the pictures I have seen from the event this year this did seem the case, as most of the pictures were of the crowds along the parade route, and not of the floats and parade marchers. I understand that Cincinnati is one of the most conservative, if not THE most conservative cities in America. And the gay community has been battling for years to get a name for themselves, and the rights that are due us. But I don't think that disappearing from the picture and from our gay owned businesses is going to help. I suppose that I'm just as guilty as everyone else. When I first came out and became single I was active in many of the gay organizations. I volunteered at AVOC, belonged to the Cincinnati Court, and attended most of the gay events throughout the year. But in the last two years I can count on one hand the events I attended, and as far as volunteering? Well I just don't seem to have make the time. I hope that this trend does not continue. It would be sad for the entire GLBT Community across the nation if this was the case.

Matters of the Heart

My brother came through open heart surgery with flying colors. He is already up and walking around. He had the surgery at Cincinnati Children's Hospital, due to the fact that his first surgery when he was 18 months old was done there. The doctors felt that it would be better to do it there as the type of defect he has was a congential heart defect and most of those types of surgeries are done on infants and children. Last night the hostess informed my mother that the hospital offered the parents an overnight room at the hospital to be nearer to their children. When mom asked the hostess about someplace for his wife, I thought the hostess was going to have a heart attack. But both mom and my brother's wife stayed overnight in the parental suite.

After seeing my brother go through such a harrowing experience it causes you to take a look at your own lifestyle. Even though my brother's heart problems are congenital it still makes me think. Smoking, drinking and all the things that I eat, that are surely effecting my heart. But does it make me stop? Probably not, but it does make me think. With each drag of the cigarette and each bite of the Wendy's burger I think about it. Maybe I should stop. Or at least cut back. That is easier said than done.

Heart disease is the number one cause of death in the US, mainly due to smoking and obesity. So far thank goodness the only heart problems I have had, have been of the emotional kind. Those are bad enough. Those are the kind that cause you to smoke, over eat and drink.

Summer Fun

Today marks the first day of summer. The heat is on it's way along with...well you get the idea. I just love summer, don't you?

Reality Check

Today was Father's Day. Being a father is one of the greatest gifts I have received. My four children have saved my life many times. I've been a father now going on 24 years. Hard to believe. It seems like yesterday when my oldest was born and I experienced that joy of holding my own child for the first time. Now he is grown and starting his own family. My two youngest went back home today after staying a few days with Dad. I wish I could see them more often. I talked to all of the kids today, and that was the best father's day present anyone could hope for.

I talked to my own father today. He is doing well and enjoying retirement. But as I was talking to him tonight I could tell that sometimes being a father is heart wrenching. My youngest brother, my father's baby boy is having open heart surgery Tuesday. I could hear in the sound of his voice the worry. Gary will be 35 in September and for the last year or so he has become weaker and unable to work. After several test, and visits back and forth to the doctors they determined that the valve replacement he had at the age of 18 months was in dire need of replacement. So Tuesday he undergoes an 8 hour surgery to correct the problem.

I can not begin to imagine the worry my parents are experiencing, not to mention my brother and his wife. Reality Checks are sometimes needed to keep us in touch with life, but they can be painful.

Happy Birthday Mom

Mom 1941
Originally uploaded by mjwoh.

Mom turns 67 today. She is one of the greatest women I've ever known. My best friend, my advisor and the one I know will always be there regardless. Yet, I know that someday she will not be able to be there, but in the past she has been the perfect mom.

Growing up she taught me the value of family and what unconditional love meant. When I became an adult she was there to advise me, but not to judge me. She was there for me many times. Through the birth of my children, my separation from my wife, my coming out and even helped me move out of a less than positive living situation with a former BF. Never once saying I told you so.

As I've grown older I realize just how blessed I have been to have the parents that I have. Thanks Mom. I love you, and Happy Birthday.

Take Me to the Bar

Rum & Coke

Have you ever noticed that once a gay guy meets his one and only and they become a couple they tend to leave the bar scene? I used to hate those kind of guys. I would always say I'd never do that. You would hear comments coming from me such as...

Now that he has a boyfriend he thinks he is too good to hang out at the bar.

Wait until it's over (which won't take long) and his ass will be right here next to me...

They need that quality time to get to know each other, they'll be back.

Well I've become one of those guys. Five years ago and before, every night I'd sit at the bar after work and drink and chat with the bartenders until about 9:00 and make my way home. On the weekends it was all-nighters. Once I was left in the bar by my friends, knowing another friend would soon be out and I could catch a ride. Only to find that he was somewhere else with his boyfriend. I was left stranded downtown. All Night. Well kinda, I went home with the bartender...

But now it's a different story. The first two years or so DJ and I continued with the bar scene. Either together or with other friends. Plus he worked at Hamburger Mary's so we spent a lot of time at that bar. Now our bar activity is limited to when his sister wants to hit the gay bars or if we go out of town. Not that I miss the bar drama, because there was plenty of it, but I think it's time to make my way back downtown and reclaim my seat. Not every night, but maybe start off slow, say like once a month?

Who am I kidding? I'll just fix myself a rum & coke right here at home and sit back and watch some DVD's...

Gay Pride 2005

Gay Pride 05

Cincinnati's "Pride Alive" Parade was held Sunday. Not as big as say San Francisco, or New York, but we have PRIDE!

The picture is of a friend who I have known as Helga. I introduced her one night to my oldest son, J1. he had never met a real queen before! It's good to see she is still as beautiful as ever. Take a look at some of the other pictures of the days events.

Catching Up With Princess

I'm feeling a bit better today, the funk I hope is lifting. Right now I am at Silver's getting ready to have some metts from the grill. He is headed off to his cruise in a few days and needed a haircut so he can look good for all those "Disney Maniacs" he will be traveling with. After reading his latest blog entry, he may need to take some condoms "precautions" with him as well. Oh yeah I forgot he is taking his son on the cruise, so I suppose there will be no enchiladas in store for him on this trip.

I talked with my daughter, Princess today. It seems that things are finally going well for her and Asshole. They both are up for promotions at work and their finances are getting in control. Now if she can just lose the "mother-in-law" things will be much better. Asshole's mother lives with them one week out of each month when she comes down to Florence from Cleveland, where she lives with her ailing parents. She constantly criticizes Princess in regards to how she keeps house, and being lazy. Princess works 6 days a week, she don't have time for very much cleaning. But the mother-in-law should not be passing judgment, I mean she spawned the asshole. They have also adopted a new pet. Now along with their dog, and two snakes, they own a cat. I little black minx. She hasn't named her yet, but she is thinking about Cleo. She also said that they are talking about possibly having a baby, and may start trying in the fall. Princess has already had two miscarriages, and with her history with asshole, I advised it may not be a good plan. I hate to see her trying to raise a child on her own. But she is her own person and an adult. Whatever happens of course daddy will be there and support her.

Well I have been told I have to get off the computer, or Silver is threatening to play his Disney CD, so I better go...

Mid-Life Crisis?

In exactly 29 days I will be 45 years old. Now age has never really been an issue for me. I always say, "You are as young as you feel and I still feel like I'm 25"

Well not anymore. There are days I feel like 65, and Lord knows I probably look it some days as well. I've been looking over my past few years and think, What the fuck have I done with my life? I have lately become a recluse, and have alienated most of my friends, due to not calling them or making plans to hang out with them, and I really don't even know why? Other than the fact that I am emotionally and physically drained at the end of the day and just want to go home and vegetate. I'm in a great relationship with DJ, and have a great relationship with my kids and family. So why am I in this funk?

Well I hate my job (see yesterday's post), and that seems to bring me down on a daily basis. And it being with DJ's grandparents I hate to say anything about it, but I do, but that don't help. Secondly I'm disappointed in my home. Where we live. At first it seemed like a nice neighborhood, quiet and peaceful with a nice landlord. Well the landlord sold the home to a noisy busy body woman who is only concerned about the cosmetics of the house (flowers, painting etc..) and not concerned that our fridge doesn't work most of the time, that our air conditioner does not work at all and now the garage door is on the fritz. Not to mention the increase in crime around our once quiet neighborhood. So here we are again looking to move with really no idea where or when or even how.

I like that Tim McGraw song that says "Remember when?" Can't we go back to the good old days?

I know you are saying, those are not big issues, get over yourself. I know I should but I just can not seem to get out of this funk I've been in. Turning 45 should be a celebration of life and accomplishments. I need to do as my friend Silver has done and accenuate the positives. So anyone out there able to tell me how to maintain a level of insanity and do that?

I Need a REAL Job

Sometimes work is not all that it is cracked up to be, but somedays it is just down right entertaining as hell. I work for DJ's grandparents. They own several properties and I along with DJ's mother Momma D, help manage them. I work at the main location where DJ's grandmother (Granny D) has her office. Upstairs over this office is an apartment where DJ's uncle (Uncle D) lives. On Friday's DJ's grandfather (Gramps) comes to the main office and spends the day. Gramps suffered a stroke almost two years ago, and lost a leg to diabetes back in November, so he has a motorized wheelchair. Well here was what happened today;

Granny D and Gramps got into a very loud argument. This happens occasionally with the two of them, but more often with Uncle D and Granny D. Gramps is usually the calm, mild mannered one. Not today. They yelled at one another for about 4 or 5 minutes when Uncle D decided to put his 2 cents worth in. Before I realized what was going on, Gramps was out the door in his motorized wheelchair, yelling he was going home. Now his home is about 15 miles away. Granny D runs outside after him, jumps on the golf cart that we have to transport ourselves around the 8 acre lot where the office is, and CHASES HIM down the sidewalk!!. This is a residential neighborhood with a few small businesses around, but there is a lot of sidewalk traffic. So we have a 68 year old woman in a golf cart, chasing a 66 year old man in a motorized wheelchair. To make matters worse, their 41 year old son, who is wearing Bermuda shorts and white support hose to his knees is now chasing the two of them on foot. They all three finally did return, but the day got progressively worse. They stopped talking to one another, and used me as a mediator!

I just sat outside and laughed until I almost pissed my pants. I so wish I would have had a video camera, that would definitely have one the grand prize on America's Funniest Home Videos and I would be able to have quit working with these psychos!!

Officially Summer

I know that according to the calendar, summer does not officially begin until the 21st of this month, but after four days of hot humid weather (with no air conditioning I may add) I made it official for myself. I had my first swim of the season. DJ, AT, J2 and myself went to Momma D and Big D's tonight for a swim in their pool. It was wonderful, not to mention we had grilled steak for dinner. The boys enjoyed themselves and I was able to relax and watch the evening turn into dusk by the side of the pool, Yes summer has arrived. For me anyway.

I also got to see REVENGE OF THE SITH tonight. I must say I was enthralled. I've never been a huge mega Star Wars fan. I enjoy the movies and have seen all of them but I don't wear a Darth Vader mask and travel around the country seeking Star Wars memorabilia. (Robin the Boy Wonder on occasion, but not Darth) But this one was in my opinion the best. Ewan McGregor is excellent as always. He is one of my favorite actors, and I feel one of the most under-rated. I felt that Hayden Christensen still needs to work on his acting. He is just too stiff and really has little emotion. His body though looks yummy. The scene in the bed when he wakes up from a nightmare was worth waiting for. Other than that everything else was true Lucas magic. The plot (even though we already knew the plot going into it) was excellent, the special effects were right on the money and it closed up the story, tidy and neat and keeps your interest. It really didn't seem that it was as long as it was. This is one Star Wars movie I will definitely watch more than once.

DJ and I also bought the First Season of Lois & Clark tonight. So I am sure my next few nights will be sitting in front of the TV, drooling over watching Dean Cain. The first season was the best and I can not wait to dig in and see him them again.

The boys go home tomorrow after a week with Dad, and I am sad seeing them go, but they will return next Thursday in time to share Father's Day with me the following weekend. I normally get irritated after a few days with them here. But as they have gotten older we seem to have more in common and we enjoy one another much more. AT is begging to stay the entire summer as he says there is nothing to do at home in the summer. If we had a bigger place I think I'd love that. So we are are working on rectifying that situation real soon.

One more little jot before I'm off to bed. This whole Russell Crowe thing has me a tad upset. He, unlike Ewan McGregor is one of my least favorite actors and Over-rated in my opinion. His arrogance has caught up with him again it seems. Throwing a hotel phone at a concierge at 4am seems a bit much, don't you think. P. Diddy made a comment on it today when he stated that "it was exaggerated and what he did was more common than you think, everyone has done it." Well, I don't think so. I mean I've been upset before, but assaulting an employee of a motel that you are staying with a phone seems a bit cocky if you ask me. But according to a compatibility test, P. Diddy and Russell Crowe are pretty close in the emotional and intellectual scheme of things. Maybe P.Diddy and Mr. Crowe need to realize that they are just normal people like everyone else and need to follow the same rules and laws as everyone else. A good stint in an anger management class sounds appropriate. But an apology on Late Night with David Letterman wouldn't cut it for me if I was that concierge.

Standing in the Line

Grocery Shopping and standing in line at most department stores annoy me. I love shopping. I just hate being in line. Now before you scold me about waiting my turn, it's not about that. It's the people in the line in front of me. For instance;

Those lines for 12 items or less. Count them before you get in the line please. 2 one gallon jugs of milk count as TWO. Three boxes of cereal count as THREE. 3 packages of Jimmy Dean Pork Sausage count as THREE, 2 heads of lettuce count as TWO, do you see where I'm going with this?
Then those little old ladies that are in the line in front of you that place their items on the belt, then you began placing your item behind them. They frantically try and find that little plastic bar to put between the items that are hers, and yours. God forbid if the sales clerk accidentally rings up your box of tidy cat cat litter by mistake.

The there was the episode tonight. I stopped on the way home to pick up, yes you guessed it, cat litter. In front of me was an older gentleman, obviously in a hurry, with one item. In front of him a young yuppie female that apparently didn't read the 12 items or less sign. When she was rung up she didn't have enough money to pay her bill, she was .45 cents short. The man in front of me, wanting to get out of the store, and trying to be a gentleman asks;
"How short are you?" the girl who is rummaging through her purse turns and states.
"That's okay, I PAY MY OWN BILLS." Emphasis on the last five words, then asks the clerk to take off one of her bags of groceries, which of course takes forever because the clerk is not sure how to do that.

Why couldn't she have just politely replied, no thanks. Why did she have to prove she was so much better. Nobody was insulting her, or trying to call her a loser with no money, this guy just wanted to get home with his bottle of Excederin. If she was such a good person, she would have brought enough money to PAY HER BILL, and she would not have went through the 12 items or less line with 32 items. I just stood back and watched as she finally left the store and the gentleman that was willing to offer some assistance just looked at her. The clerk rolled his eyes and gave her back her change. People....

So the moral of this little blog is when going to the store, make sure you have enough money to pay your bill, and don't ever try to do something nice for someone. It's not worth it. To the young girl who had to be rude to someone trying to be nice, just one word honey...It's called KARMA.

Sweltering

I decided to re-do the blog layout for the summer season mainly due to the fact that today it hit 90 degrees and our air conditioning is out. Yes we were hot, and not in the sexual way. Although the extra heat and sweat does kind of make you a little wanton. Well it does me anyway. But no go, as I have my two youngest sons here for a few days. Their summer vacation began June 1st and they have been at Dad's since then.

We had a respite from the heat today for a few hours when we went over to Silver's house for a grill out and an afternoon of D&D. He has air conditioning and a brand new grill. We enjoyed ourselves and ate way too many metts.

Received a phone call from EER today. EER is an old (not age wise) friend that use to room with DJ and I a few years ago. She moved back home to NH after having a gastric by-pass surgery and now has returned to Cincinnati to raise her child which is due later this year. It is good to have her back where she belongs. We are planning on getting together next week for a dinner and catch up on all the latest news with her.

DJ and I have also been offered a rental option. Another friend of ours is looking for someone to rent a home previously occupied by her BF. It is in a better part of town, closer to our parents and hopefully it has air conditioning! We will find out more tomorrow and then possibly see if we can take a look at it this week. If it fits into our budget and is able to accommodate our little family, then maybe we will be moved before my birthday in July.

Well I'm still sweating, and it's not getting any cooler and DJ is already in bed, my sons are passed out asleep, so I suppose it is time for me to say goodbye to another great weekend and wake to another Monday morning.

Vogue

Madonna

This past week there has been speculation that Madonna is contemplating having some "work" done on her face.

I for one think it's not necessary, the woman is still fabulous! At 46 she still looks incredible. Someone call Vogue, I think this would make a great cover shot!

Speaking of looking incredible have you seen these shots of Paul Walker? (via the socialite life) And Scott Caan. WOWZAH! Jessica Alba is pretty hot in these shots too, she's no Madonna, but still a hottie!

Bewitched

With all this hype and the trailers I've seen and heard about the Bewitched movie, I feel an air of nostalgia. Bewitched, (with Elizabeth Montgomery) was by far one of my favorite TV shows growing up. I don't think I ever missed a show. I was so in love with the show and Samantha that my dream was to be a witch. Not just any witch, but I wanted to be Samantha Stevens. Within the course of a half an hour she twitched her nose and made things right. She could do and be anyone she wanted.
The season that she went back to Salem was one of my favorites. I loved history and it brought the Salem Witch Trials to life for me.
All the characters were fun and lovable, even her mother Endora. Of course one of my favorites was Paul Lynde's character. Then of course when Elizabeth Montgomery played her evil witch twin Sarena, now that was TV!
Now Nicole Kidman is playing my favorite witch. It's not really a remake of the TV show, but a love story with a twitch thrown in. I love Nicole Kidman, and kinda like Will Ferrell, but I don't think this movie is going to compare with the love I had for the original TV show.

Happy Gay Pride Month!