“It is sometimes an appropriate response to reality to go insane.” ― Philip K. Dick, VALIS
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
Where Do I Go From Here?
Today reality set in.
I realized that me walking out on my job last week was a major dumb ass, stupid, thoughtless act. Yes, I know I hated my job and it was affecting me physically and mentally to a point where something had to happen, But...
We still have rent that has to be paid, gas to put in our cars, insurance for the cars, electric bills, food, and last, but certainly not least, child support payments. What was I thinking? Did I think that the job fairy was just going to wave the magic wand and I'd get a job the next day making the same amount of money?
I went on CareerBuilder.com last night and there are over 21,000 jobs in a 30 mile area of my home that were posted online. They ranged from physicians to convenient store clerks. As I scanned through about 200 of them I realized that most of the jobs in the pay range that I require/desire are not an option for me. Either I am underqualified or I have no degree. The jobs that I am qualified for pay much less that what I was making. So what are my options?
Go back to school?
I can't afford to shit right now because we are low on toilet paper, so school is out of the question.
Take a lower paying job?
That is the most probable solution right now. We will just have to budget our money better.
Apply for the job I want regardless of my under-qualified status?
That I could do, and be continually humiliated and become depressed due to not getting it. Or I could take the risk and go for it, and see what happens. Who knows, maybe my age and prior work experience can count for something.
The thing is I should have thought about all of this before walking out.
But I've done much more stupid things than this and things have worked out.
But just in case, if any of you happen to see that job fairy, send her my way, would you?
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